Tranquility: Revised
by Noacat
Summary: Excerpt from Chapter 1: Tranquility, from within and without. Things had become a clear spiral pinpoint of light that illuminated her final purpose on this earth. She'd made peace with all the things she'd left undone in this life. PREQUEL
1. Beginning Dream's End

_Tranquility, from within and without. Things had become a clear spiral pinpoint of light that illuminated her final purpose on this earth. She'd made peace with all the things she'd left undone in this life. Cherished all the things she'd managed to do as fate's clocked ticked and her final bow came closer and closer. Her only regret in life was that she had never truly loved someone, never had her loved returned in the same fashion. None of it mattered in the end. She would die and in dying, sacrifice herself to save the planet. The words were so easy to utter. The thought so simple and neat but it wasn't. She didn't want to die, though she had accepted its inevitability. In her heart of hearts though, she wished that there was a different end to her story. An alternate path for her to take, a solution that she'd not yet discovered, anything but her martyrdom. _

_She opened her eyes, which were glassy with tears. God, she wanted to cry, to let loose a scream of rage at the unfairness of it all. _Take it away... just take it all away... it's too big for me, _she begged the planet, hands clasped. _Why does it have to be me? Why? I don't want to die... please... _The planet hummed back to her, sending her not words but feelings. It sent her images and thoughts of all the beings that crawled over its surface. _You aren't a normal girl_, it hummed. _You are my shepherd, my last caretaker and the only one who can heal me. You must do what is asked of you; else all those who live upon me will suffer. It makes me weep to think that you must do this, but it is the only way. _In her mind's eye, she nodded her understanding, finally accepting her role in this play. Fear was set aside, and she prayed: Prayed for absolution, to purge the great sin from her world, and for the healing of an old wound. _

_A crash came from above, glass shattering as something large broke through the ceiling of the temple. She could feel the glass remnants hitting her shoulders and head. He had come, the man who would murder her. The girl opened her eyes, gazing up lovingly at her friends who could do nothing but gape in horror. She felt the_ _wind as he swooped behind her, his shadow covering her as he raised his sword high._ _The sharp tip pierced her flesh; gods above it hurt so much. She could feel the pressure of the blade as it entered the small of her back, the steel pushed through exiting through her midsection just above her breast; how easily it slid through her, as if she where no more solid than water. Her thoughts were overcome by the pain. It was all she could see, all she could feel. _

_It was hard for her to breathe because the strike had punctured at least one lung, if not both. She didn't let it show; somehow the planet gave her enough strength to choke back her own pain. She wouldn't scream, wouldn't cry... not in front of him. That would bring him too much pleasure, he wanted her to. She intended to deny him his moment of triumph. She wanted him to see her face painless and strong, and she wanted it to haunt him. He was the weak one, not her. _

_The world became a cacophony of sound and blurring lights. Whatever force that had held her companions in silent, horrified limbo released its hold on them. They shouted, someone screamed. The voices were too loud and she had found it too hard to focus on comprehending the words. She could feel his boot on her back as he pushed her off his sword. More pain shot through her body, but it only seemed to serve as an equilibrium. Sliding off the weapon, she slumped and was only saved from hitting hard ground by the quick rescue of one of her friends. His arms were so warm. It'd be okay if she could just die here. In the arms of a friend, though they'd never gotten close enough to be anything but, it didn't matter to her though, he was a friend...a good friend. One regret gone. She had friends at last. No longer was she alone in the world. They might not have understood her, but at least they loved her and accepted her for who she was. _

_She looked up at him. It was so hard to see. Her other friends had gathered around him, she could feel their presence all around her. She could feel the warmth of the love and care for her radiating outwards, beyond the confines of her mortal body. Everything was tainted black and she could feel her life ebb away, her consciousness slipping from her body and merging with creation; sweet and warm. She was suddenly pierced again, by those cold jade eyes. The cruel sound of his laughter dying away until all was darkness. _

Aeris woke with a start, tears streaming down her face. _It was that damn dream again_. _God how I hate it_... More precisely, it was a premonition. She knew it. It was a vision of her future and her eventual death, a reoccurring nightmare that had retarded her sleep for years. Aeris wiped at her eyes. Today was her birthday, she turned sixteen if you counted by human years. But she wasn't human; she was Cetra, a shepherd of the planet, guardian of the life stream and the last of her kind. In the years of her people she was quite old, her soul having lived for thousands of years, only born into this shell to serve one purpose. Being the last left behind, she had a sacred duty to perform. To rid the planet of a mistake her people had made before this new race had crawled from their caves.

The crisis from the sky -- it had been her people's down fall. Jenova was the name the Cetra had given it. They had offered it friendship, showed it what they had learned and it had used that knowledge to its own perverse end. Driving her people mad, and nearly destroying all existence. Jenova was a virus, the darkest of entities that envied the light. The Cetra were the source of that light, givers of life. It was only natural that such darkness would be drawn to them, like a moth to a flame.

_It_ gave only death. _It_ took delight in snuffing that flame out and it had taken all the power of the remaining Cetra to stop _It_. Too weak to destroy the crisis completely, they bound it with the planet's lifestream and buried it deep within the earth. In the end, the planet was saved but at great cost. It seemed Jenova's cruel game had been played quite well. In the deep places beneath the planet's crust, the creature laughed quietly as the line of the Cetra began to dwindle and their power over her prison began to fade. In the end, the crisis had accomplished its mission. The Cetra faded, their power spent and it only had to wait for the moment it would be freed.

It didn't think much of the last remaining descendants of the race that defeated it. After all, there were only two left. Shinra had taken care of the mother and all that remained was her half-breed daughter, a young girl who was ill equipped to wield the final hope – a young girl, who at this moment, shared Jenova's view of the situation.

She understood the dreams were given to prepare her for the times that lay ahead, but she wasn't exactly ready to accept fate as it had been planned. After all, her soul might have been ageless but in mind and body she was still only sixteen.

Aeris sighed, looking out the window at the choked gray sky. Slivers of light were all that managed to get through the giant plate that hung over the Midgar slums. Midgar, was the largest city on the planet, a city of dualities. The view that Shinra, the military rulers of Midgar, liked to promote was the shining silver sections on the top.

The slums underneath this top plate were never discussed. The slums were what allowed the privileged rich to live so well. The slums produced all the products used on top, all the menial workers and servants came from the slums, and the large and dangerous Mako reactors that powered the city were housed in the slums. People below the plate suffered to serve the rich and the only gratitude given to the workers were the piles of garbage that the rich dumped on them in heaps. In Aeris's eyes, Midgar was an eyesore, an abomination that she longed to escape from, but she was only a mere slip of a girl, and the world outside was just as hostile as the world she lived in. She barely held her head above water here, what chance did she have outside?

Aeris looked at her clock, ten after six; it was time to go to work. She slipped out of her night gown which was old and worn, as most of her clothes were. Once disrobed, she quickly dressed for the day. It was early February, and though it had never been very cold in Midgar, it was still chilly enough to layer clothes for warmth. She pulled on a simple cotton dress, its sleeves slightly longer than she liked. Being poor the choice between fashion and comfort was a luxury she couldn't afford. Comfort always won out. Still, there was a slight bit of vanity on her part; after all she was still a sixteen year old girl, despite her odd situation. She buttoned up the dress, looking in the mirror to confirm that she didn't look too horrible.

The dress was pink, her favorite color, as most of her clothing was. Most in the Midgar, particularly slum rats like her, wished to blend in, wearing dark colors that suited the very darkness of the city itself. Aeris did everything in her power not to blend. She was determined to stick out, to be an ocean of hope in the midst of despair. Besides, brighter more hopeful colors suited her better and brought out her bright green eyes.

Satisfied, she strode over to her dresser, digging through her drawers until she found a pair of socks. Plumping herself onto the floor she slid them on one foot at a time. She hopped up, stretching a little to get any remaining kinks out as she looked herself over one final time. The last touch was to brush her hair, pulling it up in a simple pink sash. The sash was special because it had belonged to her real mother. She'd given it to Aeris before she died, and it had a piece of materia attached to it. Her mother had called it the last hope, the white materia. She said it was the only one of its kind and that it was meant for something very special. That it would do great things, just like her brave little girl. Aeris had never understood what her mother had meant by that.

With a last tug, Aeris felt ready to meet the world for another day. Trotting down her stairs, she grabbed her coat, simultaneously putting shoes on while pulling her arms through the sleeves. It had been a habit that her adoptive mother, Elmyra, had always taken delight in. She'd swear to Aeris that one of these days she'd fall over and wallop her head real good. Despite her conviction, it never happened. Aeris seemed gifted with an uncommon grace, which she guessed came from her Cetra heritage. Not that she knew all that much about her ancestry. Her mother died before she could tell her anything. All that she knew had come in were snippets from dreams and nightmares sent to her via the lifestream, and what little information she could glean from the planet's song.

Exiting the small dwelling, Aeris picked up her basket before setting off to gather the flowers she'd be selling for the day. She sighed heavily. It was hard holding the fate of the world on slender teenage shoulders, especially since that duty was so far-reaching and overwhelming. She was so small and her task so big. Aeris tried not to think about it, tried to be positive and not let it bother her, but it did.

Her steps echoed in the quiet morn, crunching on the frost covered ground beneath her feet. Bending down, she began to pick her flowers carefully. Her home was hidden, not many came this far into Sector 5. It was best that it remained so. Being the last of her kind meant she was hunted. Shinra had long been experimenting in areas it had no business digging into.

The legendary power of the Cetra were one, amongst many, they wished to exploit for their own purposes. They'd learned about her existence around three years ago, god knows how they'd found out. Perhaps it was the unnatural field of flowers cultivated in such a barren place. Her flowers bloomed, year round, no matter what the weather. She could grow any kind of flower she wished, from hot house beauties like the orchid to the most common hardy mum. Perhaps it was the stories the locals bandied around about her "knowing" things, speaking to voices that weren't there and healing wounds without materia. When she was younger, she hadn't exactly been careful in hiding some of her innate abilities and people couldn't help but talk, especially when a month's pay was dangled in front of them.

A band of Turks, Shinra mercenaries, had been sent after her so many times she'd lost count. The man they had sent to kidnap her had taken a liking to her right from the start and she hadn't been able to shake him since – stating that she reminded him of someone he once knew. It was disconcerting. His name was Reno, and for one reason or the other, he managed to let her escape each and every time he came after her. She was unsure, to this day, if it was good luck or bad luck to have his good will. Idly twisting a bloom between her fingers, she noted there hadn't been an attempt in some time. She was probably due for a visit any day now.

Slim fingers deftly picked out individual blooms. She smiled as she looked over the riot of flowers that greeted her, heads bowing in the early morning light. Being the steward of the planet had at least a few perks. Her flowers were the only thing that brought her any real joy, though she'd never let her mother or the few acquaintances know it. Her troubles were beyond their care. They were unable to help her, unable to ease her pain much less understand it. If she told them, they'd just call her crazy or offer her comfort and sympathy that couldn't possibly help her, all the while denying the truth of her words. Sixteen year old girls predicting their own doom weren't often taken very seriously, and considering the nature of her peers, she could somewhat understand.

All the same, she tired of the doubt in other people's eyes when she spoke of things she knew to be true. _The girl who talked to the planet. The girl who had the uncanny ability to know the future._ A freak... and she wondered briefly if there was anyone else in this vast city that felt as miserably alone and misunderstood as she. Probably, Midgar was a city of lost souls. It beat you down, till you had no hope left at all. She suspected it was the atmosphere of this damned city that had been getting to her. Still, she felt a terrible, cloying isolation. Sometimes, she couldn't be sure if it was her own feelings, the planet's or those around her that she felt. Sometimes, she was convinced it was echoes of all three.

She tried to suppress the rising tears and failed. Aeris wept soundlessly as she finished gathering her flowers, clumsily placing them in her basket. Taking a deep breath to calm herself, she rose and wiped away her tears for the second time that day. She wouldn't let despair win. It had her by the boots, but damn it all she would fight it, kick out at its clawing fingers. She had to. Each day was a gift and she would enjoy it. Enjoy every last bit of life she had left. Her days were numbered. _Enjoy it, while it's yours to live_. She smiled, putting on her game face.

Stepping off the train onto the top plate, Aeris shivered, pulling her threadbare coat closer to her tiny body. Selling flowers had never made her much money, just enough to squeak by. With an adoptive mother who'd taken ill and herself and no health insurance, money had been tight. It was lucky that because of her natural gifts as a Cetra she could use her skills to help heal her mother. Medical care was expensive, besides the fact that she put little faith in Shinra's doctors. None of them were as good as her. Not arrogance on her part, only truth. Her magic would never cure her mother's illness, but neither would the doctor's care. It had seemed the last few times she'd used her skills that her mother had gotten incrementally better. It did her good to remind herself of positive things like that.

She walked the streets with purpose, determined to keep her spirits up. There were few people on the streets yet, only a few early risers, like herself, milled about. Once the morning formally started these same streets would be choked to bustling with people.

Aeris let her mind wander while she people watched so she wouldn't dwell on unpleasant thoughts. In a big city like Midgar, it never did well to look at others the way Aeris did. It unnerved people, but this certainly wasn't why she did it. Denizens of the city liked to keep to themselves, staying detached from one another. It was easier and safer. Looking garnered attention and attention was not always what one wanted, especially if it was from the wrong person. Looking was an invitation for the wrong people to mess with you.

Aeris never really cared. Fate had already determined when she died and it was not at the hands of some petty criminal. Fate protected her. At least, that's how she saw it. So she looked and watched and smiled, deciding to be the one friendly face in this cold, lost city. People much busier than her bustled past her, perceiving themselves to be so much more important than a pauper from the slums, like her, and that they knew so little of their place in the universe was enough to make her smile.

The city dwellers blurred, tones of gray and blue and black melding together. A sudden flash of silver caught her eyes. She slowed her pace, staring wide eyed at a young man who passed her, walking in the opposite direction from her own path. He was a little older than her and quite a bit taller, very handsome, with long, shimmering silver hair that caught in the bitter February wind. His unkempt bangs fluttered over skin as colorless as his hair as his gaze turned toward her. She looked at his eyes, cold, hard little lumps of glowing blue-green set in face made of stone. _Mako eyes_. She ceased movement, her heart hammering in her chest, coloring draining from her face. Her blood turned cold as their eyes met, her face frozen in unadulterated fear. She gasped, dropping her basket in the process. One thought struck her mind, running across it as fast as lightening: _"It's him!" _The man that had haunted her dreams -- the murderer of her future self. In the moment, all she could do was stare at him, his cold eyes burning into her as she shook in fear. The man eventually broke contact with her, his face reflecting a brief flicker of disdain at her reaction, his long platinum hair still fluttering behind him as he turned away. Unable to help herself, she froze to the spot like a chocobo caught in headlights, only moving once she was sure _he_ was gone.

_He left. Thank god, he left_, she thought, her body quaking with unrepressed fear.

Tearfully she bent down to pick up her flowers, throwing them back into her basket as quickly as her shaky hands would allow. As the adrenalin high wore off, she realized how silly she must have looked. Having learned long ago that feigning humanity was easier than trusting instinct, she pushed away her fear. There was no way it could have been him. That dream had always been vivid and had often left her shaken for hours afterwards; it was just a natural product of her overactive imagination. Besides, in the dream she'd been older. She just knew it. It wasn't her time yet, even the planet told her so. It couldn't be him. Brushing the encounter off, she picked herself up, dusted herself off and started off towards her destination without putting another thought to the young man who so resembled the murderer in her nightmare.

Though she couldn't see it, the young man had stopped and doubled back. He was an expert in stealth, watching the odd girl curiously as she picked up what was lost and hurried on her own way.

Aeris had managed to keep her emotions in check. She hurried as fast towards her destination, unconsciously trying to put as much room as possible between herself and the man she most definitely hadn't seen. Her destination was Fennyman's Drug and Grocery on the corner of Prairie and 44th. For the last three years she'd sold her flowers there. She had become great friends with the owner, Mr. Fennyman himself. He allowed her a small display space in front of his store. It was an arrangement that was mutually beneficial. People liked her flowers, they were so rarely found in a place of iron and steel. The pretty little girl who sold such lovely flowers had attracted more customers, good for him, good for her. Besides the fact that he thought she was just plain sweet, a quality that many city dwellers lacked. Aeris arrived just as Mr. Fennyman was unlocking his store to start his day. She was still visibly shaken, though she somehow managed not to cry and kind Mr. Fennyman took notice of it. He knew it was unlike cheerful Aeris to look as upset as she did now.

"Morning, Aeris, are you all right?" he asked, unlocking and pushing back the cage that ran across the store's entrance.

"Yeah," she answered airily, putting on her best smile. "Just ran into a really scary guy back there. I'm alright now though."

"Oh my, well, glad you're okay. You know I worry about you. Midgar is no place for a pretty girl like you. Ought to move out of this place and go somewhere better. Like Costa del Sol, or Nibelheim, I hear it's lovely this time of year. Yes, a nice little mountain town would do you good."

Aeris giggled lightheartedly, flattered that he cared about her though he knew she'd ignore his advice. "Sure sounds nice but I think Midgar needs my flowers more than anyplace else."

"Yes, I suppose it does need some color, eh? Well, you take care. Break my old heart if anything happened to ya," Mr. Fennyman sighed, turning back to his gate, his keys jingling as pulled them out of the lock roughly. "Enough chit chat. Gotta get to work. Have a great day, Aeris."

"You too Mr. Fennyman."

Aeris smiled turning her back as he went inside. Moments later she was setting up for the day, her lithe body moving in quick rhythm as the city woke around her. She sat down on her stool, her basket placed next to her for easy access. A small tiered table was in front of her, ready for today's newest displays. Picking out individual blooms, Aeris set about arranging them with nimble little fingers.

The streets began to fill as the day began. Business was slow in the morning, always was, picking up near the mid-afternoon. She liked it better when it was busy, exchanging Gils for flowers, smiling, saying thank you. Each step repeated time and time again, from sunrise to sunset. For some there was terrible monotony in the kind of work she did, but Aeris loved it. The interaction with strangers, making their day with the simple purchase of a bouquet, it was yet another positive reminder that there was still good in this world and it was worth saving.

With each sale her day brightened and not just because she was making money. She was doing good, giving the world hope. It lifted her previously dark mood and helped her to forget the morning's bad start. By the time afternoon came she'd entirely forgotten the dream and the encounter with a man who terrified her beyond measure. The weather was as beautiful as any day in mid-February could be and her customers had all been so pleasant, plus she'd made some pretty good money already. All in all, it was shaping up to be a pretty decent day. And so the time passed as she worked as swiftly as a multi-armed goddess, her smiling brightening with each sale. Unbeknownst to her, a pair of glowing jade eyes observed her silently from the shadows.

The sun set behind the clouds, casting amber shadows across the sparkling buildings of the upper plate. Workers filed out in droves, all heading for home. Days end was always her busiest time – nothing brightened a dinner table better than a nice bouquet of flowers which could also serve to soothe the frayed nerves of overworked wives and girlfriends. It didn't surprise her much that most of her customers at this hour were harried businessmen who looked like they were about eat the business end of a rolling pin when they got home.

She'd never had real concrete hours of operation, usually quitting when her sales started to dwindle or she ran out of flowers. If neither those things happened, she'd work until five thirty, when Mr. Fennyman closed up shop.

He poked his head out to see if she was there, smiling when he found she was. "Hey, I'm closing in a minute. Why don't you pack up, I'll help you when I'm finished."

She looked back, grinning back at him. "Kay!"

Happily she began to clean up, grabbing one of the leftover arrangements to put it in her basket. There were two left, a nice Jasmine and Rose bouquet that she thought Mrs. Fennyman would like. She placed it in her basket, turning back to the other remaining arrangement. The noise of an approaching customer bothered her not one bit. It was common to have stragglers at the end of the day. She felt bad that she'd have to turn him down, but that's how it went sometimes. Aeris continued her clean up, counting the day's profits without even looking up.

"Excuse me, Miss?" the stranger asked, his voice tersely authoritative. "I'd like to buy some flowers."

Still working, Aeris paid him no mind; after all, he wasn't really a customer. The officious tone of his voice told her as much. She huffed, silently slapping her city ID badge on the counter without looking. She'd been harassed by truancy officers before. They always seemed to like to pounce on her at the end of the day, asking for flowers just before whipping their badges out. Well, she was sixteen now and old enough to choose whether or not she wanted to continue with her education. Anyway, there wasn't anything Midgar's school could possibly teach her that would do her any good. Having been home schooled her entire life, not to mention the preternatural knowledge she had because of her Cetran heritage, she was most likely smarter than all Midgar's teachers combined.

The truancy officer must have not been impressed because he hadn't left. She could feel his eyes needling the back of her neck. It then dawned on her that he might actually be a customer. Pondering this thought, she turned to address him after he politely repeated his request. "I'm sorry sir, but I'm all out. All I have left is this really wilted Gardenia bouquet and I don't think--" She glanced up, and her heart stopped.

It was _him_. There was a moment she was sure she was seeing things. So sure, that she almost reached up and rubbed her eyes, but there was no mistaking it, he was really there. She hadn't imagined him, after all. Her mouth moved wordlessly, and she felt like she just might pass out, her stomach lurching uncomfortably in fear. He just looked down at her quizzically, as if he was sizing her up with those strange eyes of his; those eyes that seemed to bore holes into her very soul. Her fleeting glance at him in the morning hadn't given her enough time to measure his features. He was more than just handsome, he was gorgeous.

If she was a normal girl, perhaps she'd be enchanted by that face. If she hadn't dreamt of what he was capable of, then perhaps she could fall for that face. One look into his eyes, those eyes were empty, nearly without humanity. Nearly. Aeris looked closer. Yes, unlike the man of her dreams, this one still had a soul, his humanity neatly tucked away but there all the same. She shook herself, feeling silly and stupid for thinking such thoughts. This man would kill her, even now, if he felt like it.

Aeris quickly composed herself, tearing away her gaze. "I-I'm sorry. It's just, I have nothing left. Come back tomorrow..."

_Idiot, __why'd you say that_, she cursed herself inwardly.

The stranger continued to watch her quietly as she tried to appear too busy to talk. What a strange girl she was. He'd gotten used to the stares and the mooning of fan-girls by now. At first he thought her just another star struck admirer, but something about the girl had seemed different. And she didn't quite strike him as the terrorist type, though appearances were often deceiving. It had piqued his curiosity. So he'd sat and watched her all day, observing people had been something he enjoyed. It was the only way he ever felt like he belonged, when he acted as if he wasn't part of the world at all.

At first glance she'd seemed quite ordinary, but in his observance he noticed that she was anything but. There was an ease in her manner, a gentle grace that seemed to beacon outwards and envelope anyone that touched it with warm light. He'd never felt such warmth, and though he wished to seize it, something held him back.

He had to feel her out first, find out more about this girl. Why did she stare at him this morning, dropping her little basket in surprise? Why did her face hold fear and not awe? Had she met him before and did he just not remember? And if they had met, what had he done to put such fear in her eyes? Gentle she might be, but she clearly had something to fear and he wanted to know what that might be.

Besides which, what better cover could a terrorist group ask for, then that of an innocent young girl...

"Have we met?"

"N-no."

His eyes narrowed at her answer suspiciously, he could see how her whole body shook underneath her coat. "Why are you afraid of me if we haven't met before?"

"I'm na-n-not afraid, only cold," she answered him, her hands shaking as she broke down her display for the night.

Her face twitched, his keen eyes detecting the deceit in her reactions. "You're lying."

Her green eyes flashed, stealing a glance at him before she set to "working" again. She was about to answer when Mr. Fennyman came to her rescue.

"Ready to go?" he asked, pausing to regard the young man who stood before her, "Evening sir," he said, tipping his head genially before turning his attention away. "Ready, Aeris?"

"Yes, I am." She looked from her friend back to the stranger. "I'm sorry I ran out..."

"Then I'll come back tomorrow, Aeris."

Her eyes widened and it took every ounce of energy in her not to cry. Now he knew her name, dammit. The stranger turned and left, walking out into the oncoming night, back to the shadows from whence he came. Shakily, Aeris helped pull in her display stand and stool, letting Mr. Fennyman lock it behind the gate.

"Oh, Aeris, the Missus insisted I give this to you," he said, handing her a small bundle.

She opened it carefully, inside was a scarf and a freshly baked loaf of bread. Aeris smiled. "Oh, I don't deserve this!! Thank you so much!!"

He grinned back sheepishly. "Nonsense. You do deserve it. I went home on my lunch break and told her how sad you looked this morning. Made her feel so bad. She'd been making that scarf for you anyway, but today's as good a day as any to give it to you. Anyway, just a small thank you from us to you."

"Thank you-- OH! Give this to the Misses..." Aeris pulled out the Jasmine and Rose bouquet. "It's a lovely arrangement and I'd hate to just throw it away. Tell her, when she's done with it you can dry it and grind it up for tea!"

"Thank you, Aeris. See you tomorrow?"

"Course, good night..."

They both smiled before going their separate ways. She could barely hold on to it, and once he was gone it faded instantly. How silly of her to think her troubles had been wiped away. They never were. That man, that damn man haunted her. Wasn't it bad enough that he'd eventually take her life, why'd he have to haunt her before he did it? What had she done in her previous life to deserve such punishment, she didn't know, but it wasn't appreciated.

She was no longer able to hold the crescendo of emotions at bay. Hot tears flowed down her face and she ran faster than she ever had in her whole life. The world became a tear streaked blur as her feet pumped beneath her. She had to get away. He was probably still here. If he followed her to her work, why not follow her further? Why not? Because haunting her was his new favorite job now. Running blindly, she knocked right into someone as she rounded a corner. Her first terrified thought was that it was him, and as she fell to the ground, she couldn't help the hysterical scream she let out almost without realizing it.

"Watch where the hell you're goin' you crazy bitch-- Oh... Hi, Aeris!"

She immediately looked up towards the now familiar voice of her most favorite wannabe nemesis. "Hello, Reno," she said, voice thick with grateful irritation.

"Hey, what kind of greeting is that?"

"Like yours was appropriate!" she snapped back, quickly changing the subject. "So what are you here for anyway?" Hoping against hope he wasn't here on official business. She scowled at him as he casually lit a cigarette.

He grinned innocently, cigarette balanced precariously between his lips. He had immediately taken note of her aggravated tone, knowing that there was no way just seeing him could have put her off so much. "Whoa! Someone's had a bad day! Don't worry, ain't here on business, only pleasure..."

Aeris rolled her eyes as she pushed herself up to a sitting position; she hated it when he tried to smooth talk her. "Dear god, what's that supposed to mean?" After asking it, she realized she really wasn't sure she even wanted to know.

"Means I have a day off and I'm gonna visit my favorite broad." She gave out an indignant gasp, her eyebrows knotting in disapproval. He ignored her, taking another long drag off his cigarette before holding it out and flicking the half smoked butt away with a single elegant movement. "What?! You know I only live to bug you. 'Sides, it's either that or try to get Rude to talk, and I'd rather run in front of a bus naked than that."

"Nice visual. Could you help me or something? I think I twisted my ankle," she intoned blandly, rubbing the area in question for emphasis.

"Sure, anything for my baby," he replied, quickly giving her a hand up. "So what's up with the bad mood?"

"Long day. Encounter with a creepy guy. Don't want to talk."

"Creepy guy? So that means you'll be needing an escort." He paused and when she didn't object he continued. "I'm your man! Lead on, Señorita!"

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**HELLO AND WELCOME!**

Well, here we are, again. I'm not even sure where to start -- other than to say that a few years ago I wrote a story called "Tranquility". I wrote it and finished it, a real feat now that I think about it. In any event, I always thought about going back and revising it. There were parts of the story I felt that just didn't work. Characters that I completely misinterpreted and did no justice. Plus, it was one of the first stories I wrote, so it wasn't very good in places. But there was something there. Something good, that could be made better. And here we are.

This is the new and improved "Tranquility". Sure, it doesn't start out much differently right away, but a few chapters in and... well, those who have read the original will notice the difference. I've left the old version up, so y'all can contrast and compare. (I don't think that's against the TOC... if it is -- Mods, please give me a heads up so I can take the old one down myself!)

Anyway, enjoy this new version. Reworked, with better spelling and grammar (hopefully).

Ciao

Noa


	2. Skyward Slowly Dreaming

The gentle golden overtones of early evening deepened into the lavender dusk that served as Midgar's version of night. Aeris and Reno walked slowly through the streets as the city emptied of busy workers. Street lights winked on, throwing hazy impressionistic illumination over the darkened streets. A light snow started to fall, downy flakes floating lazily from the heavens to meet the ground. Aeris turned her face up, letting the flakes kiss her skin gently.

"It's a beautiful night..."

"Eh," Reno grunted noncommittally, another cigarette hanging from his mouth. "Hey, I'm hungry. Get somethin' to eat with me."

"No." She really hated it when he ordered her, rather than asking.

"_Come on_, I hate eating alone. I'll take you to the best place in this part of town. Cygnus, you can't pass up Cygnus!"

Aeris glowered at him. "Yes, I can, and what am I going to eat there? Five gil milk shakes? I can't possibly afford it. Thanks, but no thanks."

Reno smiled as if he had a sudden epiphany. "I'm buying. Don't even try to say no. It's my birthday present to you, so it'd be rude if you refuse..."

"How did--"

"It's in your file," he said, grinning from ear to ear. "Come on, just say yes. You know I won't stop buggin' you till you do."

She relented, albeit grudgingly. "Fine."

They walked in relative silence as they came upon their destination, a large and fancy looking restaurant. It was decorated in retro-chic; the main part of the restaurant looked like some kind of horrible lounge with a vague jungle theme. Next to it was a smaller section for customers who didn't have the time to wait for a table. It had lots of little booths and a neat looking lunch counter set up, replete with gaudy neon tubing. Reno entered first, chatting up the Maître d' as if he were a long lost brother. Aeris felt very out of place in the restaurant. Everyone else was dressed very nicely, their clothes costing more than she made in a week. Even Reno fit in better than she. The trademark rumpled navy blue suit he wore as a Turk wasn't exactly evening formal, but it was more appropriate than her simple dress.

Reno procured a table, looking back and smiling at Aeris. She returned it weakly. The Maître d' showed them to the diner section, where Reno took a seat in one of the booths. He sat down, immediately picking up the menu to order. Aeris followed suit, consciously aware of the stares she got as she entered. She just wanted this day to end. She picked up a menu, looking it over glumly as she inwardly bemoaned the overpriced food and the overrated restaurants that served it.

Reno looked up from his menu, noticing the troubled look on Aeris's face. "So, what's going on with you? You haven't been yourself. I mean, by now you'd be yelling at me about how expensive this place is and insisting we stop at that stupid vegetarian bar you like so much." She said nothing, looking at him balefully with those incredible green eyes. "Is it about that creepy guy?" She nodded halfheartedly. "Hey, tell me what he looks like, and I'll beat him senseless. Nobody messes with my Chica but me."

"No and No, and I'm not your _Chica_..." she mumbled.

He harumphed disagreeably, though he was too lazy to negate what he knew to be the absolute truth. "So whatcha gonna order? I'm thinkin' 'bout the steak..."

"It's so expensive."

"So what?! Remember, I'm paying." He paused, coughing uncomfortably as he handed her a medium sized package. "This is for you. Happy Birthday."

"Hey, I thought _this_ was my present!" she objected, reluctantly taking the package.

"Aw, quit yer bitchin' and open the damn present."

She carefully peeled back the colorful paper surrounding the box, folding it neatly and setting it next to her. Taking as much care with the box, she opened it as well. Pushing back the tissue paper, Aeris drew out a small silver cylinder. She turned the thing over in her hands, looking at Reno with confusion.

"What is it?"

"It's a staff, retractable, so you can hide it on ya. And if someone wants to start some shit, push that button and VIOLA! -- a staff with which to beat your enemies senseless." He smiled, pointing at a small button on the side of it with cigarette in hand.

"Thank you, but, uh, I don't know how to use something like this and I'm not sure if I need it."

He scowled this time, snorting as he stubbed out his cigarrette. "Course ya do! What with the creepy guy and all... pretty girls like you need something to beat off thugs with. And don't worry 'bout how to use it, I'll stop by your church sometime and give ya pointers and shit." She gave him a dubious look, lips pursing. Clearly, she wasn't convinced yet. So, he rambled on. "...Plus, when I bought it, it came with a basic materia starter set. You know... Fire, Lighting, and Cure. The whole shebang. So bein' an ancient and all, big with the magic, you don't even have to use it as a weapon. See, I'm thinkin'." He smiled charmingly, pointing at his temple as if to emphasize to her that he was smarter than she took him for.

She didn't believe it for a moment, but she didn't disabuse him of the thought either as she laughed lightly. "Yeah, okay, thanks. I suppose it'll come in handy."

The waitress came up to take their order, taking Reno's first then Aeris. She wrote down quickly, giving Aeris another one of the many odd stares she'd gotten this evening. Before she left he asked for a newspaper, she nodded and left, returning a few minutes later with their drinks and a newspaper for Reno. He took it with a nod, rustling the pages as he looked for the sports section. Sipping his coffee and pretending to read, he looked over at Aeris again. He'd really like to find out who that guy was. It bothered him, because while her status as an Ancient wasn't widely known, there were ways for the wrong people to find out those kinds of things.

Shaking the paper importantly, he waited until he was sure he had her attention. Setting it down, he looked her straight in the eye. "So, seriously, tell me about this guy." She let out a strangled growl that he quieted with a hand. "Call me concerned..."

She sighed resignedly. "It's... it's nothing. Don't worry about it."

"You always do that _'Don't worry, it's nothing you'd understand' _bullshit. In case haven't noticed, this city is a shit pile, filled with criminals and fuck jobs that'll knife you for the hell of it. The only thing keepin' every prick in this city in line is fear, and even then that don't amount to shit. Midgar ain't no place for someone like you, Aeris. You see the good in everybody. That's why I worry..." At this, she snorted and rolled her eyes. Her reaction wasn't appreciated. Reno scowled and smacked the surface of the table demandingly. "Who the fuck is he and what's he look like? I wanna know, so I can educate him on who not to fuck with."

The flower girl shifted uncomfortably, mumbling something about a nightmare and a duty to her people. Clearly, this went deeper with just an encounter with a creepy guy. Hell, there were thousands of 'em in Midgar and he knew she'd had her fair share of bad scares, but this was something else; he'd never seen her so rattled. Inhaling deeply, he thumped a knuckle on the table and gazed at her inquiringly. "'Sides, I might not understand a damn thing about all that Ancient shit or whatever, but at least I can listen. You can't just bottle your shit up all the time, ya feelin' me?"

Another long and heavy sigh came from her, before she asked quietly: "Reno, do you believe in fate?"

"Nah, the only person who decides what happens in my life is me," he answered without thinking. The dejected, almost hurt look she gave told him he'd answered wrongly. "Do you?"

She looked at him sadly and nodded. "Reno, what if you knew what was going to happen to you? Like, if at a certain time and place, you knew you were going to die and who was going to kill you. What would you do?"

"At this point, this is all just hypothetical, right?" He waited, and she nodded again. "Well, if I knew the guy who was gonna wack me, I'd find him and shoot the mother fucker in the back of the head while he slept." This drew a disapproving look from Aeris, to which he smiled sheepishly. "But, uh, that ain't you. You'd probably just give him a hug and cookie, and send him on his way... Sorry, my advice is bad. Please, continue."

"I'm not sure if should," she teased, realizing that it really did feel good to at least get it off her chest. "I had this dream and in it I saw the exact moment of my death."

Reno took a sip of coffee and thought for a moment. "Hmm. So, it's like that one slasher movie with the guy with the claws and the killing in your dreams. I thought that if you died in your sleep then you die in real life..."

Aeris rolled her eyes. "No, you don't. Well, at least in mine _I _don't. Anyway... In my dream, I was murdered and I saw the face of my killer. The guy who I saw in my dream looked just like this guy I saw on the street today. I sort of freaked out... but then he left and I forgot, but then later... he must have followed me, because at the end of the day, he came to my stand and started asking all these questions--"

Reno's eyes narrowed, a dangerous light glinting in their depths. "What does he look like? For real. I don't believe in fate, and I don't know that I believe in your dreams but if you think he'll hurt you, I'll find the sonvabitch and hurt him first... free of charge."

Aeris shook her head. "You don't have to--"

"No, I want to know. What does the cock sucker look like?"

She thought for a moment, and then began to describe the stranger animatedly. "He was really tall, pale-- probably a SOLDIER. He had Mako eyes... um... His hair was sort of a silver color and really long. He had these bangs that..." Aeris paused to look at Reno, who's eyes had gone wide. "What?"

He said nothing, holding up a finger while he shuffled through the newspaper. Lighting on the page he was looking for, he held it up to Aeris. A tiny gasp escaped her lips as she looked at the picture in front of her.

"Is that him?" She nodded. "Titan's hirsute ass-crack, Girl! Do you live under a rock? You dreamed that Sephiroth, THE _General _Sephiroth... is going to kill you! I'm not gonna call you crazy, but I have to say it is pretty effing weird."

She frowned, a passing look of hurt flickering across her face. "You know I don't read the papers!" she snapped defensively, to which he only shook his head and sighed.

"What, General Sephiroth? Never heard of him... do you know how ridiculous that sounds? How could you NOT know it was him?"

"Well, he wasn't in his battle gear! He was dressed all casual and... I just don't take the time to think about people like that! All I could think about at the time was that his face was the face I saw in my dream..."

"Well, true or not, I'd hate to go up against him; youngest General in Shinra history and one cold bastard, if you believe the press. Tseng's met him, says he makes the Turks look like warm fuzzy bunnies. Said the dude was ruthless..."

"Okay, remember the part about you reassuring me and letting me get my feelings off my chest? _So_ not helping."

"Okay, all right... I'm just sayin', if he wanted you dead, I think you'd damn sure be there already. Prolly just hitting on you -- Ramuh knows, you're awful cute. So no worries, yeah?"

"I didn't say he'd do it now. It's far in the future..." she grumbled, dunking her straw in her water.

"Well, seeing as you're so worried, I'll stick around. Escort ya to your train tonight, and how 'bout I meet ya at your church tomorrow morning? Keep an eye on ya and stuff. Though I still don't understand what you're so worked up about. Most girls in a thirty mile radius would be creaming their shorts if the Great General Sephiroth wanted their ass. I've heard he likes 'em young..."

Aeris stuck her tongue out at him by way of reply, looking up as the waitress came and gave them their food. She ate quietly, listening to Reno chatter on about the most mundane of things. He didn't seem to mind that she wasn't contributing much. In the end it didn't matter, it's not like he'd understand what she'd have to say.

Humans were disconnected from the world, never hearing its cries, whereas a Cetra was intimately connected to the planet, and the web of life. It constantly surrounded her like a warm embrace. It was what allowed her to know what made everything around her, from people to the rocks to the buildings to plants, right down to the fiber of her own being. She could hear the planet's cries, feel its pain, and to not have anyone to share it with was worse than death to her.

Still, her confession had made her feel somewhat better, even though Reno didn't believe her, and the food was good, even though it was much too expensive. She even got to try her very first five Gil milk shake, and she had to say it was worth what was spent. And anyway, she hadn't really expected him to understand. He was right about one thing though: sometimes you really did have to let things go.

After the meal, Reno walked her over to the train station, saying good-bye as she got in. He watched her safely seated in the train, until it took off and sped through the darkened streets. He too was troubled. Why was the General of the entire Shinra armed forces snooping around, looking to do... whatever it was he wanted to do with Aeris? Had they finally got tired of him screwing up and assigned someone else the job? Reno hoped for Aeris's sake that they hadn't. Both he and Tseng had agreed long ago to screw up as much as possible when it came to her. She was too sweet a kid to land into the hands of a freak like Hojo.

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**AUTHOR'S NOTES**

Another thing I was going to mention -- in the original story there were parts that had overtones of certain pairings. You'll note that this isn't the case so much in this version. Yes, I do touch on the various people in her lives. The fact that many of them are men sort of brings up the issue of her being a very pretty girl and them being men. And not to stereotype, but if you are a pretty girl and you have a straight male friend, chances are they like you. A lot. Even you both consider each other just friends, in the back of his mind... he's probably thought about you in a less than friendly manner at some point in time.

In fact, I'm sure if you're a pretty girl with lots of hot guy friends, I bet you think about them too sometimes... alone... at night. You know you do.

Sicko.

But I kid.

What I'm trying to say is this: there are no concrete pairings in this story. You'll get overtones, but if you're looking for a story with a singular OTP -- then swim away. (Personally, I don't believe in OTP, it's silly and quite frankly... boring. Really, if you can dream it, write it - draw it - be it and don't be ashamed.)

So, if you have an open mind and aren't completely devoid of intelligence, this story might just amuse you for a certain amount of time. Also, note THERE WILL BE NO SMEX! No, really -- NO SMEX! Just a bit of mild romance that sort of bleeds into WAFF.


	3. In Reverence of Sanity

Amongst the elite, the Shinra building was a symbol of their success and ever growing wealth, a seventy floor glass and steel monument to the city's excesses. It was in this monolith that Sephiroth hoped to find some answers to the questions buzzing through his brain. Why he was so suddenly obsessed over a common flower seller, he himself didn't even know. Though one thing was certain, something in his mind would not be satisfied until he knew each and every little thing about her.

She was familiar somehow and he knew, without a doubt, she was hiding something. He felt a pulse when he was near her and in that moment he knew she was like him. Maybe not exactly in the same way, but he felt in his gut that she wasn't quite human. She had power, like he had power...

And if he knew anything about power, it was that it was sought by all. It was seductive, and in all ways necessary to maintain control or take it. And if the girl truly was like him in some way, then there would be those who sought to use her as they did him.

Ever since the first day his promotion to general had been announced, he'd been surrounded by scads of people heaping accolades on him, jockeying to curry favor with him in hopes of a promotion, wealth, and fame – whatever it was they thought they could get from him. The old saw _that women wanted him and men wanted to be him_ applied to his status in the public eye. For the life of him, Sephiroth couldn't understand why. Any number of complimentary adjectives had been attached to his name by both sexes. Compliments meant nothing to him. It was hollow adulation, and he couldn't stand it. They were sycophants, only greasing him up to try and share in the glow of _his_ hard won success.

And what kind of success had he achieved? He'd killed a lot of people, expanded Shinra's influence, made widows and orphans in the thousands, and destroyed the economy and well being of an entire culture. _Some success_. But he did it. He regretted it, now and then, but he still did it... no questions asked. Why? If he hated it so much, then why did he do it? The answer to that was: he liked his work just as much as he hated it, because he gave him purpose. It made him feel, on some level, _almost _normal.

Doubt had been plaguing him as of late. He had always felt an otherness in him, something that separated him from everyone else. It was liquid and ill defined in his own mind, but he knew, without a doubt, that there wasn't something quite right about him.

The battlefield was the only place he ever felt alive. When he wasn't killing, he felt disconnected, disjointed. On some level, he knew there wasn't something quite sane about the way he operated day to day. The way he felt about people. How utterly expendable they were. How he could watch a man die in agony and not feel a thing.

In the press, they often spoke of his cold professional manner as the marker of his greatness as a general. If they had known the depths of that coldness, perhaps they wouldn't speak so glowingly about him. He didn't care if he sent a hundred or a thousand men to die... Death meant nothing to him, so why would he care if it meant something to others?

Beyond all that, he had found that his control had been lacking of late. It felt like someone or something was watching him. Something behind his eyes, crawling and hissing, it was there... watching and waiting. It slept now. Slept in the daylight hours but at night it came alive and wandered his mind. It showed him such awful things. Such horribly awful things, and he would wake feeling ashamed of himself and confused by the rock hard erection those images elicited.

Over and over again, the thing behind his eyes would whisper to him. It told him what his real purpose was, told him that death was his gift to this world. It spoke to him so much at night that he ended up not sleeping very much, just to stave off the nightmares.

No, it wasn't sane to think that way – normal. Abnormal. Yes, there was something not quite right about him. Something broken that needed fixing, not that he'd ever trust another living soul to help him. All of them were fools because they couldn't see the sickness in him. It was so plain to see, yet they were blind to it. What would those fools think if he told them what he really felt? If he answered their ridiculous questions honestly, instead of lying and giving them the answer they want to hear.

What would the world think, indeed, that under his carefully cool exterior lay a man in constant torment and barely in control of his own sanity? They could say what they wanted about him; let them call him a genius... let them call him the Great Sephiroth, but it all rung false in his ears. He knew what he was, a freak of nature. What else could he be? Being abnormally strong and intelligent beyond his years, he could easily cast high level magic men twice his age had difficulty mastering. Not to mention the color of his hair. He was young, only twenty two, yet his hair was as silver grey as an old man of sixty.

And perhaps he was an old man. Maybe he was some sort of immortal being, who'd lived so long he didn't remember how he'd gotten here. Of course, that would require him to believe in such fairytale nonsense. But still, the thought had merit. He'd often thought that maybe he wasn't human at all. Those thoughts had been especially potent when he was younger, less so now but they were still there, creeping in the deep dark back of his mind.

He used to dream of far off places, of magic and adventure, as all children did. Those things were swiftly beaten out of him. All except one. He often dreamt of a young woman with light brown hair and eyes just like his. She was crying just for him. Reaching out to him, and she looked so sad, so frightened. Sometimes he thought it might not be a dream at all. Sometimes, he liked to imagine that sad woman was his mother. The mother he never knew. The mother whose name he had to trade for a week's worth of pain.

He had asked about his mother. He had told Hojo about those dreams. And in exchange for those two things, he suffered like no other.

At the time, Sephiroth had wondered if Hojo would even tell him anything at all. The man liked to inflict pain; especially on him... and the bargain Sephiroth had negotiated seemed to amuse him. It would have been easy to break his spirit along with his body, but he didn't. Perhaps Hojo liked it better when he screamed. In the end, the crazy bastard had told him his mother's name. Jenova. His mother's name was Jenova, though he never got an answer about who the woman was in his dreams.

Secretly, sometimes he put that name to the face, so he could pretend for even a sliver of time that those dreams were really memories, that the woman that called to him through the ether -- to this day -- really was his mother.

He closed his eyes in an attempt to silence the empty voices of his own mind.

_Ridiculous. _

Sephiroth pushed open one of the glass entrances to the Shinra building. The eerie glow of fluorescent lights painted the main entrance a sickly green tint. It had the effect of making the entire lobby look like one large hospital room. _Or perhaps a laboratory_... He shivered with revulsion. This was why he killed? To keep a place of degradation and sin working smoothly, allowing it to subjugate souls one by one till nothing was left. There had to be something more, something bigger and better than this. His purpose in life shouldn't be to serve the very reason for the world's sickness. Once he had the resources and the answers he sought, perhaps he wouldn't serve it any longer.

That girl, Aeris, he wanted to know her secrets. He was firm in his belief that she was involved, one way or the other – informant or terrorist – it didn't matter much to him, with the terrorist attacks that had plagued the city, but there was a reason underneath he didn't want to acknowledge. He sensed, more than knew, that she held a vital fact that he needed in his search for something better than what he called life. What did this girl know... what was she? The light she exuded, there was something in it he needed. Perhaps it had been that one blessed moment of silence, when he'd gotten close enough to reach out and touch her light -- that one moment when the voices inside his head had quieted and for a moment he felt connected to something greater than everyone and everything.

He thought this as he walked through the lobby, all eyes in the room watching as the enigmatic General strode towards the elevators.

Employees visibly moved away from him as he approached. Whether it was awe or fear, or a combination of both, didn't matter in the least to the young man. He was known for his rather unpredictable fits of temper. Sephiroth stood in front of the bank of elevators, choosing one at random and waiting quietly. The other employees who waited near the same elevator relocated to one of the other lifts. No one wanted to be in a cramped space with General Sephiroth. He couldn't help but smile wryly to himself at the irony. Some of these same people, who would stand next to him without fear while he was in the spotlight, couldn't bear to be near him when it wasn't. Wanting him and loathing him at the same time. Sometimes he wondered if it would be better if he'd just let go and give into the voices.

A pleasant bell sounded as his lift became available, the metal door soundlessly opening. Sephiroth entered, his long black trench coat flapping in rhythm with his strides. Stepping into the elevator, he gazed out the wide glass window and without looking pushed the button for the sixty-second floor. The chime went off as the doors closed, though Sephiroth didn't hear it. He was concentrating on his own strange reflection. He'd never liked looking at himself, the face in the mirror a constant reminder of his lack of normalcy. Silver hair draped over dark fabric. He had gone casual that day, leaving his straps and armor in his apartment in favor of a simple black silk shirt and black cotton pants, along with his trademark coat. He wanted to blend, if that was possible for one such as him.

The elevator ding had gone off, startling Sephiroth from his reverie. Moving swiftly through the doors before they even opened fully, he walked down the empty hallway to the Shinra library. He didn't even take note of the guard at the entrance, and the guard didn't dare to stop the General and ask him for identification. His boot heels clicked on the shiny surface of the floor, echoing as he moved swiftly down the hall. He entered the public records section, making a bee-line for the computer terminal.

Typing fast, he entered the information he wished to search for. Hopefully there were only a few young girls around fifteen to seventeen with the name Aeris. He was looking for as much information as he could get. Ideally, he wanted to find an address. He'd tailed the girl earlier but had to back off once she met up with that Turk, which was an entirely new curiosity. He wondered if he might have discovered a leak of some sort, or perhaps she was an informant – he'd thought as much earlier but he was becoming increasingly unsure.

Considering her powers, it wouldn't surprise him a bit if more than one group were anxious to coax the girl into using her gifts for their cause. A fact which he liked not one bit.

In any event, he couldn't keep following because eventually the Turk would sniff him out; they were blood hounds that way. So, in lieu of following the girl, he decided to skim Shinra's records, hoping for a birth certificate, school records – hell, he'd settle for whatever he could dig up on her, though he realized this might be asking too much, as the girl looked to be a slum rat. And finding someone in the slums was like looking for a microscopic needle in the world's largest haystack.

The biggest mistake Shinra ever made was to allow people under the plate to even exist. They should have burned that hellhole to the ground and salted the ashes. _Idiots. _

The computer chugged and hummed, the little hourglass tipping up and down on the screen. Slowly the information requested came up, and he was beyond shocked to find only one record. One record. No birth certificate. No school registration. No arrest records. Nothing. It was like the girl didn't even exist but for that one record.

It was in the restricted access library, coded AS-AG-102-T. Sephiroth's eyes narrowed contemplatively. The code was familiar to him; it was used to indicate a file that had anything to do with the Turks and their activities. The Turks. He'd seen her with one. _What the hell did they have to do with that girl?_ _Damn it_.

Being the General of the Shinra army he had nearly unlimited access, nearly. The only files he couldn't touch were the Turks, but in the moment it didn't make a difference to him. He was on a mission now; surely, it was his own mission, but a mission non-the-less. There were things in that file he needed, and he'd be damned if anyone would stop him. Not that anyone could even if they tried.

A few minutes later he broke into the Turk's library, after having knocked out the guard at the door. Sooner or later someone in Main Security would see the unconscious guard on the closed circuit, and he'd be caught. But he'd have what he wanted by then. Flicking on the light, he found the file cabinet he wanted and tore the drawer open, breaking the lock. Long fingers flipped through the files, rapidly viewing the numbers as he went. He stopped, fingering gently touching the file he wanted, his eyes gazing at it sharply. Pulling it free, he leafed through the papers inside it. The one on the top was a formal request to the Turks for their assistance in finding the girl.

**Request-102 DALV-01 03-28-XX**

Status: Active

Subject: Female, approx. 12 to 13 yrs. Name unknown.

DOB: 02-07-XXXX, approx. from science record-GAS-Ifl-193/GAS-Ae-194

Subject Description: Average in appearance and stature for age. Hair most likely light brown to black. Eyes, unusually bright blue-green. No other defining physical characteristics.

LIV.CAP/DOA: Alive and in good condition

Notes: Subject is requested for testing upon Prof. Hojo's orders. Subject has affinity for all forms of planet-life. Look for subject to have job in horticulture industry. Check flower shops, greenhouses, and nurseries for subjects matching description. Will have success at growing flora in unacceptable growing conditions, look for reports of vegetation growth in barren areas of city. Subject most likely lives in lower plate and is not a registered resident.

Assigned to: E172621-TSE

Sephiroth read the short document, pulling it out and setting it to the side. He continued flipping through documents. Most of them were progress reports, noting the different leads that had been investigated. He ignored them, flipping continuously until he came to another document that caught his attention.

05-13-XX Addendum to RE-102

Contact has been made with subject. Flower seller possibly residing in Sector 5. Female, name Aeris, last seen in Sec. 5 abandoned church. Subject is known to frequent church, reports indicate unusual growth of vegetation in area. Further tests needed. **Science Dept. recommendation -- take test sample from specimen J/N-SEPH-01. **Subject is thought to be an ancient. To determine Subject's status, expose to specimen SEPH-01. Subject Aeris should have strong negative reaction to sample. If status is positively identified, capture and return to Shinra HQ – Executive Order 187 is given if Subject GAS-Ae-194 identification is negative or undetermined.

Sephiroth paled -- specimen SEPH-01 -- that was his number, the one used on all the science department documents regarding the various tests performed on him. It explained her fear of him to some extent. But _why_? Why would exposing her to one of his test samples cause some kind of reaction, unless... unless... Perhaps she was a medium of some kind, adept at reading auras or some such nonsense, and perhaps... perhaps this meant she knew what he was...

He'd heard of people who were sensitive to such things. Psychics and whatnot, to put it plainly, he'd never believed in them but her reaction – her reaction to him was one of horror, of terror. It was as if she could see the sickness inside, as if she could hear the voices and whispered horrors that compelled him to destroy. And he couldn't deny the fact that when he saw her that morning he had felt an irrational anger bubble up within him. He had wanted to crush her. To kill her in the most brutal way possible, and at the time, he, himself, had been horrified by the thought.

In an instant, his motivations had turned on a gil, and whether or not she was a terrorist or an informant was immaterial. She was a mystery. His mystery now and he would find her out. He had to talk to her, he needed to. Because the sickness inside was starting to sound all too reasonable, and he wasn't sure how much longer he could resist its pull. She knew, she saw, unlike all the others and he wanted to know why. Maybe she had answers. Maybe she was the key to silencing the darkness that whispered low and sibilant... because he could remember after the revulsion to the light, he had felt, for just an instant, warm and welcome. If he embraced that light, perhaps he could put a stop to whatever madness seethed inside... perhaps... perhaps... perhaps... He carefully tucked both reports into his coat, turning his head slightly to the door. His ears heard footsteps in the hall, the company he was expecting had finally come.

"What are _you _doing in here?" a voice drawled, the words coming out with a slightly nasal Wutanese accent.

He turned to regard the man speaking to him, recognizing the leader of the Turks as he stepped into the library. Behind the raven haired leader were a host of low level grunts with weapons drawn.

"I was reading..."

"Hn." The Turk seemed oddly unimpressed by this answer. "This area is restricted. How did you--"

Sephiroth silenced the man with a look, his jade eyes glowing brightly with malice. He put a hand to his Masamune, which he had always by his side. The General closed the gap between them in the blink of an eye, his movement so quick that the Turk barely had time to register the movement. Tseng's eyes widened minutely. He was suddenly eye to eye with Sephiroth, and he was afraid, though he barely showed it. What the Turk allowed him to see was clear contempt. The look in his eyes and the message in his stance telling him that Tseng didn't believe for a moment he was just reading.

"This area is restricted, _General_. I'm going to have to ask you to leave."

"What a coincidence, I was just leaving."

"Good." Tseng's dark eyes took in the files the General was holding. "And I'm afraid you're going to have to leave _those_ here."

Holding up the files, he waggled it at Tseng like it was a carrot and he was the jack-ass. Tseng reached out to take it carefully, hand slipping inside his suit jacket, just in case the General decided to do something. Sephiroth unfurled his fingers, letting the file drop to the ground and scattering its contents. Tseng scowled at him, forgetting everything else momentarily for indignant annoyance. The Turk bent down and began to pick up the errant papers, stuffing them quickly back into their folders. Sephiroth stepped over him, striding confidently out the door and shoving past the guards. He had what he wanted.

"General Sephiroth," the Turk called after him, his voice echoing commandingly off the empty walls of the restricted section.

Sephiroth stopped and waited, his back turned on his co-worker. "Was there something else?"

Files held neatly in one hand, the Turk snorted. "Yeah, just wondering why the _Great _General Sephiroth was digging around in our files without going through the proper channels." He paused, though not enough for an answer to his purely rhetorical question. "But I suppose heroes don't have much time for paperwork..."

"Indeed."

Tseng grunted, his fingers clenching around the files as he glared at the General's back. "Hero or not, the next time you're feeling curious, I suggest you follow protocol. I'd hate to be responsible for the death of a co-worker, wouldn't you?"

The General turned his head minutely, and sneered: "Heartbroken."

"Glad we have an understanding."

Sephiroth smiled genteelly, his face devoid of anything that would resemble real joy, and walked away, coat billowing out behind him like a great black sail.

* * *

For those of you who've read the original, you'll notice the biggest difference at the end of this chapter. Hee. 


	4. The Best Laid Plans

Reno walked down the corridor that led to the Turk's private offices. Idly smoking a cigarette and wondering if he'd get some sleep tonight. He'd seen Aeris safely onto her train, promising to meet her bright and early at eight the next morning. Like an idiot he agreed without even thinking to clear it with his boss. Dully staring at the ugly office art that decorated the hallway, he wondered if Tseng'd be pissed. _Yes, he probably will be_. Tseng wasn't short tempered, but when he did get angry you had to watch out. It's the slow fuse that leads to the biggest payload, leastways that's what he always figured.

Reno pretty much expected Tseng to cuss him out for about five to ten minutes and then tell him to fuck off because he had better things to do. That was Tseng's way. Sauntering up to the his office, Reno prepared himself; really hoping to god there weren't any big assignments tomorrow. He sighed and put on his most serious face.

Swinging the door open on complete chaos, Reno looked around Tseng's office in shock. Tseng wasn't a particularly neat individual. The rest of the Turks always teased him about his messy office, and though he pretended offense, Tseng always took it good-naturedly. He insisted that there was order in his disorder, and he could easily find anything he needed. What greeted Reno this particular night was anything but the normally disorderly order, it was downright bojanked. This was a mess, a god-damned fucking mess—no, no, it was the mother of all grand fucking messes.

Several large cabinets had been overturned, contents spilled on the carpet. The room was illuminated by one fluorescent light bulb that flickered wildly. Its twin only occasionally sputtered to life, small sparks of electricity snapping desperately at regular intervals. There were a number of large and ugly holes punched in the wall. One filing cabinet was riddled with bullet holes. Eyebrows rising far into his hair, he surveyed the area mutely, eyes falling to a painting of the sea that he'd had always liked. It barely hung lopsided on the wall, its protective glass shattered into spiraling spider webs.

Reno stood for a moment, staring in gap mouthed awe. Bouncing up and down on the balls of his feet, he whistled. The man in the middle of all of it barely noticed. Tseng sat at his desk, the only piece of furniture left remotely untouched, glaring darkly into space while dragging on a cigarette.

Reno cocked his head and shrugged his shoulders, coolly regarding his boss. "Love what you've done with the place."

Tseng looked up slowly, eyes glazed over in thought, his face blankly mysterious in expression. "What the fuck do you want?" he growled.

"Damn! Just checking in... No need to be so hostile. So what the fuck happened?"

"Shit happened..." Tseng gazed around, dull apathy in his eyes disappearing. "Had some issues to work on..."

"Ah! Issues... So the obvious choice to working through issues is to destroy your office. Gotcha," Reno said, clearing off a space and righting a chair to sit.

"Yeah, either that or I kill someone. I figured the brass would frown on murdering for fun... decreases the profit margin on murdering for hire, I suppose. Besides, I've been meaning to redecorate... What brings you up here?"

"Just checking to see what's on the plate for tomorrow," Reno commented, eyes fixated on the end of Tseng's cigarette and the ash that was just about to fall on his suit. Much to Reno's relief, he absently flicked it onto the floor before leaning forward.

"Urmph," he grunted, struggling to grab his schedule book. Leafing through it, he grunted again, barely acknowledging Reno's presence as he spoke. "Not much. Well, one thing in Nibelheim, but it's a total bullshit job. I'm sending the request back to the military. We're Turks for fuck's sake. Heidegger's assholes can go and do recon. I'm tired of them treating us like errand boys," Tseng seethed, stubbing out his cigarette on his desk, heedless of the damage it caused. "So, what's up with you?"

Reno looked at him blandly. "Nothing. Just wondering if I'm on clock for anything, that's all, you know... being a proactive member of the Shinra team."

"Odin on a jumped up chariot-driven crutch, you saw that memo too? Who the hell comes up with puerile rubbish like that? God damned corporate pig fuckers... Be a team member; let us stick our thumb up your browneye and twirl it around -- it's absolutely the most offensive, bone-shattering stupidity... I mean, MY GOD! Filthy, acne-scarred retail chowderheads have to put up with that shit, but I'll condemn myself to the lowest depths of hell in a brimming chamber pot before they start that pushing that bunch of mealy-mouthed, fourth-rate business school bollox down here--" Tseng abruptly paused in his tirade, as if something had just occurred to him, and looked at Reno, dark eyes peering at him, weighing his co-worker's demeanor. "How long have you been a Turk?"

Reno thought for a moment, trying to trace back his history. He'd never been good at remembering things year by year. He lived his life by the seat of his pants, no time to write shit down in a mental notebook.

"Fuck! I don't know three, four years maybe... more or less... Why do you ask?"

Tseng picked up a pencil off his desk, errantly thumping it on the mahogany surface. "Because you have _never_ been a proactive member of the Shinra team. _Never._ I just hand you what I think you can handle and you do it. So tell me what's on your mind and quit dancing around the issue like a virgin on prom night."

"I kind of made a promise to a friend for tomorrow..."

Tseng laughed. "And would this friend be of the female persuasion?" The bright flush suffusing Reno's cheeks answered for him. "God damn! Wanker. You are a wanker... and bloody well too damned predictable. Could you keep it in your pants for two seconds, I mean, honestly. Please? I'm _begging_ you--"

"Aw! Fuck off! It's not like that... It's Aeris! Okay? Aeris," Reno snarled, leaning over to stub out his cigarette onto the desk. "She wanted me to walk her to work tomorrow. And don't ask why... It's a long story." Much to Reno's irritation, Tseng hadn't stopped laughing. Only the volume decreased, until it finally tapered off, but his smug smile remained. Aggravated, Reno decided to change the subject. "So, long as we're revealing our feelings, what's the story with this mess? You still haven't fessed up."

Tseng thought back for a moment to his encounter with Sephiroth. Anger began to well up again, but he quickly tamped it down as there really wasn't much left of his office as it was.

"Hmpf... Speaking of our dear Aeris, _this_ has everything to do with her. Documents were stolen from the Turk's restricted library. Documents from her file, to be exact," Tseng murmured placidly, belying the fury within as he flung his pencil up at the ceiling. He stopped to stare up and watch it stick into the tiles with a satisfying tack. "I'm worried they might be assigning her to another department. I suppose it's a good idea, you keeping an eye on her on your days off and all. So, are you two going out behind my back or is it something else?" Tseng glanced at Reno sideways, giving him a little smirk.

"Something else," Reno replied tersely, his tone unusually serious. "She had some weird ass dream. Convinced that she knows when she's gonna die and who's gonna kill her. Really freaked her out, poor kid. The kicker is, she thinks that General effing Sephiroth's the one who's gonna do it -- I mean, talk about crazy ass shit... It goes above and beyond ridiculous and straight into redonk. I had a hard time breaking it to her that--" Reno rambled on for a moment or two longer, aware that Tseng had suddenly sat bolt upright at the mention of the General's name. "Now I know you've got issues with him too, but you have to admit, it's bloody unlikely--"

Tseng's eyes flashed hotly and he exploded. "UNLIKELY MY ASS!!! Who do you think stole the god damn files?!" he bellowed as he stood up abruptly, wrenching his gun from his shoulder holster and aiming. Pulling the trigger without interruption, he shot off the rest of his rounds into the already bullet riddled drywall. "SON OF A FUCKING WHORE!" Anger spent, Tseng threw the weapon down with contempt and slumped in his seat. "Reno, I'm going to tell you some things right now and you have to swear that it won't leave this room. Do you swear?"

"Yeah," Reno agreed hesitantly, feeling very unnerved and on edge.

"Because if you breathe a word I will personally hunt you down and kill you like a mongrel dog in the street, we on the same page?" His voice was eerily casual, though the words clearly brooked no argument. Reno nodded, a gesture which apparently wasn't enough for Tseng, who glared at his co-worker, hands tented impatiently. His eyes narrowed as he repeated his warning without words.

"Fuck, _yes_! Shiva's mint chocolate tits, you want me to engrave it on my god damn forehead?!"

Tseng seemed indifferent to the insult; as long as Reno understood, he didn't care. "Fan-fucking-tastic. First things first, I want you to tell me everything Aeris said, did… EVERYTHING. Get me?"

Reno nodded slowly, wary of the dangerous glare in Tseng's dark brown eyes. He recounted as well as he could, everything Aeris had told him. Stopping only to answer Tseng's questions, of which he had many. Tseng was disturbed by what Reno was telling him. He was now less worried about a transfer, and more worried about what the General might want personally. Reno finished his narrative to Tseng's satisfaction, waiting patiently while his boss thought. His mind working fast, as he tried to put together scattered details. _So if it's not some sad excuse for Hojo to transfer control to the Science Department then what is it_? He turned the details over, because nothing seemed to add up. The only thing he could trust was that Aeris knew her stuff. He absolutely believed what she dreamt had some truth in it. _Still, why would Sephiroth want to kill the last Ancient_?

"Are you done thinking yet? I'm bored... and I'd like to sleep sometime tonight. Got an early morning tomorrow."

Tseng shook his head, breaking away from his interior dialogue. His eyes met Reno's, dark and intense as he began his tale: it was five years ago, his very first encounter with Sephiroth and his first day as the leader of the Turks. Shinra had given him a small contingent of soldiers, and they were supposed to infiltrate Materia production facilities in Wutai.

Daojia was a tiny city in the eastern mountains of Wutai, and it had been rumored to be the country's materia production center. It was common knowledge that Wutai had been refining and using materia longer than any other nation. Professor Gast, the supposed inventor of materia, had actually studied for a short time in Wutai. He'd never been privy to the exact process they used to refine it, but through simple observation of their product, he had made many correct guesses on how materia was produced. After years of development, he had perfected his method and allowed Shinra to release and distribute it.

Though most of the world bought Shinra, Wutanese materia was always more prized, as it was more effective, and, frankly, of a higher quality than Shinra's mass-produced materia. Better quality, higher priced, and rarely found, Wutanese materia was in demand. It wasn't soon before they had cut in on Shinra's market. Profits were down twenty percent, and the President was on the warpath. He ordered millions in research and development programs, trying to find out what made materia from Wutai so damn good.

Dozens of scientists and millions of gil later, no one had any idea how it differed from Shinra made materia. Finally, the President broke down and contacted the Shentso-pao, Wutai's governing body. He begged to know the secret, to let his scientists in and figure out what they did differently. In the interests of international relations, that was the line anyway. A Shentso-pao representative had politely refused the request. Their refining techniques were considered a national treasure; the _Quo tang-zi lian_, as they called it in standard Wutanese and roughly translated into Midgardian it meant '_the __secret stone technique of the planet'_. The knowledge of this technique was considered a gift from the gods. This gift had been given to a priest in the village of Daojia hundreds of years ago in appreciation of his benevolence towards the planet. The technique was passed down throughout the generations. Only those who could trace their lineage all the way back, directly to the first priest, could learn the technique. All others were refused, especially nosey foreigners.

This enraged President Shinra. When Shinra said jump, you said '_how high?_' Not,_ sorry, you're dirty foreigners, and we won't share_. Furious that Wutai didn't seem to understand who they were dealing with, an operation was quickly set up to steal the information they wanted and to send Wutai a simple message: Don't mess with Shinra.

So Tseng and a bunch of soldiers were sent to Daojia, landing on the beaches in Wutai only to find that they were to sit on their thumbs. R&D wanted to perform a little test before they'd be let in. A test for their new pet, the super soldier execs in the company had been crowing about for years. _Sephiroth_. Tseng remembered reading some shit about him in his last meeting with Rufus. He was the first soldier in Shinra's grand new army. Slightly altered genetically to be stronger, faster, smarter and in all ways better than your average grunt. A cold, emotionless killer, trained from the time he was a boy to obey, the perfect warrior, and Shinra's crowning achievement.

They'd waited for years for a formal test, what better way to showboat success than this? So they sent their pet into Daojia with orders to recover Wutai's refining secrets. He was supposed to only kill the mayor of the town as a warning, only supposed to kill anyone else if they resisted.

By the time Tseng and his troops arrived as backup, flames could be seen flaring up from one of the larger buildings. He entered the village, his troops following hesitantly. They came to the village square, passing the bodies of at least a dozen villagers on the way. There stood Sephiroth, silver hair fluttering in the breeze like a death shroud. Tseng watched as he sliced through a villager with a single graceful stroke of his Masamune. His pale face had been expressionless as blood began flowing from his victim's throat. He'd barely even flinched when the arterial spray jetted out and splattered against his pale cheek, wetting skin and hair as it spurted upwards like a fountain. The young man turned towards them, his cold, jade eyes burning in their sockets. He wiped the gore off his cheek with one hand, smearing it down the side of his face as he strode towards Tseng and his men.

By this time, the entire village had erupted into a violent conflagration. Before anyone could say boo to a ghost, a building collapsed suddenly in front of Sephiroth, stranding him on one side of the flames. Tseng was about to act, to shout to his men to find water, but then the impossible happened. The platinum haired soon-to-be-general stepped out of the flames, as if their heat meant nothing to him. Calmly walking forward like he just got out of the shower.

Tseng stared at him as Sephiroth looked directly into his eyes and he could feel the power radiating off him. In that moment, a sudden and unexplainable feeling washed over him. It was something worse than fear. It was a feeling so dark, so wrong, that there was no word in any human tongue that'd capture the meaning behind it. This feeling... it was the sure knowledge that this man held more power than any other man in the history of the world, and with this power he could do anything he pleased. He could kill every last person alive or save the world, and no matter which he chose, there wasn't a thing anyone else could do about it.

With this feeling, he realized there was nothing Shinra could offer Sephiroth that he couldn't get on his own. He was only working for them as a convenience, because there was nothing else for him to do. _What if one day, there was something better_? _God help us all_, was the silent thought that had ran through his mind that day and every day since. Whatever future lay ahead for Sephiroth, Tseng was sure that pain and death would follow. He could see it in the depths of those cold, jade eyes.

Recovering himself, Tseng had demanded an explanation, what had gone so wrong that it ended in this madness? Sephiroth insisted that it wasn't his fault. The villagers resisted. He tried to be reasonable, but they attacked him. So he killed them. _No, he slaughtered them_. Twisted bloodied bodies littered the ground like paper trash. The slowly burning streets ran red with blood. Men. Women. Children. Hell, anything breathing was now dead as a fucking doornail.

Tseng had killed a lot of people in his time, in a hundred different ways but never on this scale, and never with the level of pure malicious intent Sephiroth seemed very capable of. And he was only a man. One man had savaged and slaughtered a town with over a hundred residents in a few hours with a sword as his only weapon and no materia. Alone. The implication in his mind was bone chilling. In that moment, he knew true fear, which was compounded by the fact that their mission had been completely bollixed -- a fact which Sephiroth seemed rather unconcerned about, much to Tseng's irritation.

His only comfort was he couldn't be blamed for the fire. The village elders had panicked and set it aflame to keep their secrets from the foreign devils. In the end the only thing gained from Daojia had been one summon materia and another large unidentified materia that was broken.

To make a bad situation worse, Daojia's destruction had been leaked to the press and threatened to become a P.R. nightmare for Shinra, which just turned a simple mission that had been somewhat bollixed into a complete cluster fuck. To justify the viciousness of the attack on Daojia, Shinra news reported that they were hiding weapons of mass destruction. Most people bought it, rallying behind the President as he pronounced an all out war on Wutai. Not that Tseng cared that they covered it up. It wasn't like it was the first time they'd perverted the truth. Hell, most times, he was the one who did it for them.

It was the way they held up Sephiroth as the hero of the day that bothered him. The man had slaughtered an entire town and they threw him a god damned parade, like what he did in Daojia was some kind of absurd success. It was an unmitigated failure in Tseng's eyes, of the highest caliber. Sephiroth was uncontrollable, unpredictable and patently a risk to himself and to others. He had no business in a military organization. No business in ANY organization. Tseng had made this opinion abundantly clear in the many meetings and reports that followed. The only place Sephiroth belonged was in a highly secure mental institution under heavy sedation. Not that the brass gave a damn.

He made General shortly after the Daojia incident, which bothered Tseng even more. He took it upon himself to find out more about the General. What was he? Why was he? Because he was more than just mildly genetically altered, that was a rope of bullshit so thick he could smoke it.

Internal espionage, that's what they'd call what he did, an offense he could get fired for, but he didn't care. It had been his expertise at this kind of thing that had gotten him where he was today. After a lot of leg work, he'd dug up documents relating to Sephiroth's creation, though they were few and far between, gathering evidence of massive genetic manipulation, experimental mako injections, and the introduction of distinctly non-human genomes into his body.

Sephiroth wasn't really human. Part of him was, but there was alien anatomy writhing within him. That freak, Hojo, called the non-human genome Jenova and had identified that it might be of extraterrestrial origins, though the files were really vague and unhelpful on where it came from or what it really was. Tseng had tried to track down more about it, but came up empty. Whatever Jenova was and where it came from, it was obviously so classified that not even he would be able to dig up more. So he left that thread for the conspiracy theorists and went for others.

Finally, he hit the jackpot, digging up Sephiroth's medical records. The one that had interested him most was the standard psychological test given to all Shinra employees before employment. According to the psych test results, Sephiroth was unstable, suffering from periodic blackouts and loss of memory. The notes on the document sent chills down the spine.

_Subject exhibits extreme antisocial behavior combined with social anxiety. He is suspicious and harbors paranoid ideation and is extremely cold and aloof. Reports that he often feels empty, leading him to exhibit reckless behavior that is characterized as suicidal, thinking nothing of endangering others or himself. During questioning, it has been observed that the subject seems completely without empathy or sympathy for the suffering of others. The severity of subject's emotional retardation is staggering. The patient exhibits little to no emotion beyond blind rage._

_Patient has also reported experiencing unusual perceptual events, i.e. hearing voices, feelings of detachment from the world, etc... _

_This has lead to an unstable view of self, leaving the subject with mixed feelings of superiority/inferiority. He is known to have fits of unreasonable temper, especially when personal issues are brought up. Patient is diagnosed as being a combination Schizotypal/ Borderline personality, though through further testing additional mental defects may be present. _

_**Doctor recommendation:**__ Subject's mental health extremely unstable, even disturbed. What is most alarming is his complete lack of empathy, as he seems completely indifferent to suffering, including his own. When angered, subject becomes __dangerously hostile__. Employment is __**not**__ recommended._

It gave Tseng no pleasure to realize that Sephiroth wasn't the perfect warrior they'd been led to believe – that he was, in fact, dangerously unstable – a train wreck waiting to happen. Tseng had never been a spiritual man, but he did believe that there was some order to the universe. Sephiroth had no place in this order. His power was too great, and Tseng could see that it would only lead to more destruction. Millions suffering as the village of Daojia had.

Reno stared at Tseng in slack jawed astonishment. He wasn't convinced that Aeris was right, but it did give good credence to Tseng's belief that the man was dangerous.

"So, what does this all mean? For us, I mean. Sure, Sephiroth's dangerous and he might hurt Aeris, but what the hell can we do about it? If it's like you say, the guy can take out an entire village. I don't see us standing much of a chance in a fight with him, fair or unfair. So where the hell does that leave us?"

Tseng thought carefully before answering. "Maybe..." He paused, thinking for a moment. "Maybe, we don't have to fight him..."

"Yeah, that's a cracker jack of a decision. _Not fight him_... what're we gonna do, then? Tickle him with flowers?"

Allowing Reno's insult to fly over his head, he tapped his fingers on his desk as an unusual idea began to bubble in his mind. "Hey, I wonder if Rufus is still up..."

Reno gave him an odd look, annoyed that his superior jumped from thought to thought without clueing him in. "I'm guessing that be a big _NO_, good buddy. Girlfriend goes to sleep at ten on the dot like a fricking old lady."

Tseng cursed under his breath in Wutanese. He regarded Reno for a moment, before staring off into space for a bit, thumping another pencil on his desk. "How pissed d'ya think he'd be if we interrupted his beauty sleep?"

"Pffhhpptt, _reeeeeeeeeally_ pissed," Reno answered with a guffaw. "Why and who cares? We still haven't dealt with the situation at hand--"

"It has everything to do with it, numb nuts!" Tseng shouted, chucking the pencil at Reno's head and feeling reasonably satisfied at the hollow sound it made as it collided with his skull. "Rufus isn't a big fan of the General, unlike his father. I think he'd be interested to discuss our views on that job in Nibelheim, don't you?"

At first, Reno really hadn't understood what he was getting at. He was far too busy rubbing the small red lump on his forehead. Ever so slowly, Tseng's words sank in.

Reno smiled wide, his eyes narrowing deviously. "You wanna call or should I?"


	5. Memory's Trailing Remembrance

Reno waited, and waited, and waited and waited. Standing outside Sector five's abandoned church, he lit up a cigarette and prepared to wait some more. She was late. Fifteen minutes late, to be exact. He looked at his watch again, his eyes nervously darting from it to the street. After last night's conversation with Tseng, Reno was rattled. No, he was beyond fucking rattled. He was on edge in a way he hadn't been for years and he hadn't slept as much as he wanted either.

"_Where the fuck is she_?" he thought, glancing down at his watch for the hundredth time.

He felt a sharp tug at the back of his head as someone yanked his ponytail hard. Reno instinctively spun around, pulling his gun from its holster and brandishing it at his unknown assailant. The muzzle of the weapon confronted startled viridian eyes.

"OH! SHIT! FUCK! SHIT! DAMN! I'm sorry Aeris! It's just... and I thought-- I didn't know it was you!!" Reno stumbled over the words, trailing off as he felt unable to come up with a good enough excuse for pulling a gun on her. He quickly holstered it, smiling sheepishly at her.

"And who'd you think it was -- black market hair thieves? Better watch out... I've got scissors!!!" She grinned, his transgression instantly forgiven, holding her fingers out and miming a pair of furiously snipping scissors.

"I said I was sorry, GEESH!" he barked, his voice boyishly embarrassed. "Anyway, you should be the one apologizing, not me!"

"B'wha... why?"

"For bein' late!! I was about to call Tseng up and send out a search party!!"

"_Really?_" she queried innocently, interested and amused at the same time. "So what's with the sudden change? Yesterday, you were barely willing to believe me and now you're all jumping at shadows."

"Found some things out, that's all you have to know. That and I'll protect you, both me and Tseng. We won't let that bastard touch you."

He looked over at the girl next to him, his hard eyes softening just a little. They chatted amiably the entire way to Mr. Fennyman's. Perhaps one of the first times they hadn't argued when in each other's company. Reno made sure to keep her as comfortable and relaxed as possible; he even curbed his swearing because he knew it upset her.

He had told her he'd be watching. That she ought to go through her day like nothing was different. She had nothing at all to worry about, because he was near, even if she couldn't see him. So he watched her the entire day from a secluded spot. Nothing had happened, and Reno had become bored and anxious – he wasn't one for sitting still for long periods of time. He hadn't had a cigarette in four hours and he was hungry. Still, watching Aeris wasn't all that bad. He supposed he could have had it worse.

Minutes later, a young man with black hair approached her stand, dressed in the uniform of a Soldier Elite. Reno narrowed his eyes, the boy suddenly piquing his interest. As he watched, the Soldier picked a fight with Aeris, their conversation fast and furious. She stood, an unhappy grimace on her face, green eyes flashing as she jabbed her finger at the boy. He gestured back wildly, and Reno could hear him shout something at her, but the words and meaning were garbled. The Soldier grabbed her by the arm and roughly began to drag her into a nearby alleyway.

And as he crept up on the couple, he didn't pay much attention to the words they were saying. All he could see was that man's hand on Aeris's wrist, holding it in what he assumed to be a crushing grip. Blinded by rage, he struck out, his electro-mag rod connecting solidly with the back of the soldier's head.

Everything had happened so suddenly that Aeris had little time to react. She'd seen a flash of red and blue behind Zack and before she could blink, he'd crumpled to the ground.

"What the hell..." she asked no one in particular, rubbing her head as if it helped her understand what just happened.

She stared blankly at Reno as he stood over her ex-boyfriend triumphantly. He wasn't looking at her. Instead, he toed at the body, his weapon casually slung over one shoulder. She stepped forward, a small frown on her face but then stopped. His gaze met hers, and it was so cold. The Reno in front of her was not the friend she had gotten to know. His face was set, as if made of granite, eyes blankly murderous. No wonder so many people feared the Turks. She had never taken him seriously, never. Until now.

"Reno, uh... what is going on?"

He looked at her levelly, his voice emotionless. "Aeris, I want you to leave now."

She looked at Zack again, slowly realizing what Reno was going to do. "No..."

"Aeris," he replied, a warning note in his voice.

"No!"

"Aeris. LEAVE NOW!" he ordered, the tone in his voice frightening her.

"No, I won't," she objected, fingers rubbing her throbbing temple. "Not until you tell me why you just beat my ex-boyfriend senseless."

"He was going to rape you."

"He... What... buh... Raped..." she stammered, painfully confused by his statement. Taking a deep breath, she decided to start all over again, hoping it'd make sense the second time around. "Okay, let me get this straight... you think _he_ was going to rape me – what in the world made you think that? My god, you've worked with him before! You two know each other! Are you crazy?"

Dreadfully bewildered, Reno frowned and prodded the body's head with the end of his staff until he could see the face of the man he just knocked out. "Huh, it _is_ Zack."

"Yes, yes, it is Zack. I'm glad we're all on the same page now, though you haven't explained why you knocked him out!"

"Dragged you into the alley, thought he was gonna hurt you," he grumbled, feeling a bit cheated – he'd really wanted a fight. To mollify himself, he settled for vigorously poking Zack's prone form with his foot, and he was somewhat satisfied when it finally got a moan out of him.

Hearing his explanation, she couldn't really be angry. Puffing out her bangs with a breath, she looked at him and shook her head. By the tone of his voice, she wasn't totally convinced that he hadn't known who it was. Then again... it _was _Reno, who'd never been known to think things through properly.

"I suppose I should thank you."

"Yeah, you're welcome. Sorry I beat up your boyfriend."

"EX-boyfriend," she corrected flatly, not at all happy about his response but too exasperated with him to say anything.

Reno grunted, nudging the body with his staff, having tired of kicking him. Aeris scowled. "Stop that."

Just at that moment, Zack began to come to. Aeris had already knelt down beside him, massaging his shoulder has he sat up, rubbing his head. Pulling his hand back to look at it, he grimaced and made a strangled grunt when it came back stained dark with blood.

"Wha happa?" he asked, gazing at Aeris blearily.

"Reno happened," she replied, nose wrinkling as she stared at his hand. There was so much blood.

The Turk grinned somewhat guiltily, giving the soldier he'd just brained a sloppy salute. "Yo." He waited a beat. Long enough for Zack to turn his head and glare at him as best as one in his condition could. "Sorry 'bout that."

His head was still muddled and filled with cotton, but, even so, Zack knew his apology was halfhearted. He scowled at the Turk. Had he been of a more volatile temperament, perhaps he would have staggered to his feet to teach the arrogant mercenary a lesson he'd never forget. Lucky enough for Reno, Zack was incredibly easygoing, not to mention forgiving. It also helped that his head hurt like hell.

If he'd been a lesser man, Aeris knew that the injury he received might have killed him. Being a member of the Soldier Elite had its privileges – super quick healing being amongst them. Even so, Zack would need to be tended to. Quick healing or not, his wound had not stopped bleeding. Uncomfortable enough with the thought of using her powers in front of Zack, she was downright reluctant to do so in front of Reno as well. Despite being her friends, they had given their loyalty to Shinra which meant she didn't feel they could be trusted with certain aspects of her gifts. The less they knew of her power, the better.

Knowing what she had to do, Aeris sighed deeply. "Reno, could you give us a minute?" She looked back at him, noting the obvious look of disapproval on his face. Clearly, he didn't intend to leave, if she judged by the defiant way he crossed his arms. "_Reno._" There was a warning note in her voice, one that was hard to ignore. Even harder to ignore was the look on her face, which was just plain scary.

"What? I ain't leaving you alone with him."

She closed her eyes. Her jaw tightening as she opened them. "Do I even _want _to know why?"

"Might try something," he mumbled. She gaped at him, wide-eyed and incredulous. "What?! Ex-boyfriends try stuff all the time!" Aeris sat back on her heels and stared at him blandly, obviously irritated by his thickheaded-ness. He pointed at them accusatorily, already knowing that he'd lost but committed to his opinion. "You were fighting!" Her lips thinned while her index finger impatiently beat a tattoo on her arm. "Okay, leaving now." And just before rounding the corner out of the alleyway, he looked back and said with as much seriousness as he could muster: "Holler for me if he starts something..."

Once she was sure Reno was gone, she tended to Zack. Pulling the healing energies of the planet, she deftly wove them around her Ex's head injury until she was satisfied he'd be all right. After just five minutes of healing, Zack was back to being his old goofy self again. The dull lethargy faded and light came back into his eyes. If she hadn't been tired and annoyed with him, she might have been a bit happier about it.

"Why are you here?" she demanded. "I mean, really." Because that crap about him just coming round to check up on her was just that – crap.

"I was worried about you..."

"You weren't worried about me the last three months," she pointed out helpfully, with not just a little bitterness. "I don't see what could've changed so much between now and then."

"I'm not allowed to worry about you, then?"

"Well, considering _you_ broke up with _me_ – the answer would be, no, not really. And this brings us full circle, to the part where you tell me why you're here and what you want."

"You're mad."

"Figured that out yourself, did you? Your mother would be proud. Of course, I'm mad! What did you expect? You dump me, for no apparent reason as far as I can tell, disappear, don't call me for months and then you just show up out of the blue, wanting to talk... honestly, what did you think would happen? I'm sorry, but you just can't treat people like that..." She paused, her eyes hard, face set, and her heart beating as fast as a humming bird's wing as she continued. "You can't treat _me_ like that. Other girls might have put up with it, but I won't, Zachary Brannigan. What you did was inexcusable--"

He put a hand over her mouth, knowing it'd probably just make her madder, but he had to stop her. Right now, time was an issue with him and he needed her to understand. "I know. I'm a jerk. I didn't – see, what I mean was... I'm sorry, Aeris. I was just scared, is all. I've never been serious with a girl before. Not like I was with you. I just... I'm sorry."

"You're sorry," she repeated, tears at the edge of her vision.

"Yeah, sorry. Listen, I screwed up big, I know that. But I've been doin' some thinking lately..."

She laughed as she stood up, dusting herself off. "_You've _been thinking," she scoffed. "That's rich--"

He sprang to his feet with calculated grace, a scowl darkening his visage as he gazed at his ex-girlfriend. His face bore an eerie kind of calm and a gravity he was never known for. It was so out of place that she almost forgot to hold onto the bitterness in her heart. She opened her mouth to say something, to make another jab at him but he silenced her with a finger.

"Don't. I mean it," he commanded. "I deserve all the anger you got in you. I was an ass. But I HAVE been thinking. I made a mistake. I know that now. A big one. I should have never... I was an idiot to let you go." He stopped and looked at her, and she could see the tears in his eyes. Tears they both shared. "I was an idiot and I'm sorry."

"Is that all?" she enquired tightly, not wanting to forgive him but knowing that she eventually would.

"God damn it, Aeris. I said I was sorry."

"Well, maybe sorry isn't good enough..."

"Why do you have to make things so difficult?"

"I make things difficult?" she exclaimed. "_I _make things difficult?!! I'm not the reason we're here right now. _You_ were the one who made things difficult, not me!"

He stuttered out an explanation that she blatantly didn't listen to. She was far too upset at this point, and so unable to figure out what she ought to do, she cried.

It should be noted that there are several things a man can do when a woman bursts into tears. Invariably, anything he does is most likely the wrong thing. In that moment, he just stood there silently, allowing her to weep uncomforted – one of the wrong-est things any man can do.

It hadn't always been like this. She remembered a time when despair didn't play so heavily on her heart. When hope came easily to her and she didn't grasp desperately for reasons to be optimistic. Truthfully, she realized that her brightest times had been when she was with Zack. Somehow, their time together had briefly melted her worries away.

She had met him almost a year and a half ago, on a rainy mid-summer evening. The storm had come out of nowhere, instantly drenching the unprepared city in a curtain of water. Usually she had anticipated these kinds of things, but that day she'd been off. She hadn't felt well and had been plagued for the last few weeks with an unseasonable flu.

When the first drops began to hit she'd hurriedly packed up, just finishing up as the storm got its land legs. She said a quick goodbye to Mr. Fennyman and scuttled towards the train station. The clouds chose then to let loose their burden. As cold drops of rain pelted her, she ran as fast as she could all the while holding a hand up to shield her eyes. Within a few seconds her clothes were soaked, clinging to her skin unhelpfully. All she could do was keep running, feet slapping on the wet ground. She wasn't really looking where she was going. Instead, she was concentrating on reaching the station as fast as she could. She ran headlong into a young man running in the opposite direction, nearly falling over.

He had been so sweet then. Apologizing profusely and repeatedly asking if she was okay. Aeris had assured him she was. At that moment, really she wanted nothing more than to get out of the rain. She had told him as much and he'd just laughed.

"What? Worried about getting wetter?" he teased, gesturing at the torrential downpour.

It had made her laugh, he was right of course. What was the sense in running from the rain when it'd already soaked her to the bone? He was so handsome. Dark midnight hair, set off by the deepest pair of violet blue eyes she'd ever seen. It was the first time she'd seen eyes tainted by Mako up close. She had been entranced by it, unable to take her own eyes from his, gazing raptly into their strange luminescence.

"What am I? A freak show?"

She blushed, he was teasing her again and she laughed. Both had become unaware of their current situation, attention solely on each other. Aeris tentatively asked him about his eyes and whether or not he was Soldier. He nodded; a somewhat cocky but irrepressibly cute smile crossed his face. In fact, it was his first day as a full-fledged member of the elite squad. He was on his way to tell his parents when he'd bumped into her. With amiable glee he recounted this story to her. Aeris listened politely, wondering why someone like him would talk to her. She was a simple girl from the slums. He was destined to live up on the plate, his privilege as a member of the First Class Soldier Elite.

"Hey, what's the matter?"

"Nothing, I should go..." she whispered.

"Why? It's beautiful out!"

She smiled weakly, he was teasing again. Didn't he understand? Couldn't he tell by her clothes and her manner what she was?

"It's just..."

"What? You're from the slums, who cares!? The most beautiful flowers are found in the wildest places," he said gently, mako eyes softening as he gazed at her.

She remembered how hard her heart had beat at that moment. Looking into those bright blue eyes, barely able to move or speak. Aeris wondered now how many girls had gotten that line, but then-- she'd been impressed, flattered even. Her mother had always called attention to her beauty, but that's what a mother was supposed to do. This was the first time a young man had done so. Most were too intimidated by her beauty to say one word to her, let alone a compliment.

A delicate smile formed on her lips and she was about to thank him. A booted foot kicked out into a large puddle, splashing her mid-sentence. Aeris gaped for a moment and frowned. She splashed him back playfully. Both of them returned splashes until they were breathless with laughter, dancing in the downpour. It was a magical moment, one that she had treasured for so long but had recently forgotten.

Or at least... she'd_ tried_ to.

It had been the two of them from that moment on. Her mother of course disapproved, as Zack was a soldier and in her eyes nothing but a Shinra lackey. Aeris knew differently. Many times over the last few months had she examined her decision and she'd come to the same conclusion every time, that at one time, Zack had really loved her, even if it was only fleetingly.

For six blissful months they were together, and Aeris had believed that she'd found her true love. They spent every spare moment together. She was busy with her flowers and he with his work in Soldier. Somehow they managed to find time for each other. She loved the time she spent with him and never in her life had she had as much fun. They went to movies, plays, arcades, coffee shops.

Strange irony that he always brought her flowers, even though she didn't really need him to. In every way he was so sweet to her. She could remember a thousand wonderful conversations with him. He took her to the Midgar Botanical Gardens once. They had a picnic lunch on the lawn. She'd never forget sitting there eating a sandwich he'd made himself, while lovely mid-day sun filtered through the cathedral-like glass ceiling of the greenhouse. He made her laugh so hard that day, made her laugh everyday.

She smiled at the memories, wondering where it had all gone wrong...

If she were to guess, it'd have to have been a few months down the road before the first few small spats began.

One fateful day, he'd come to her house. They had an ugly fight, where lots of things were said that neither of them meant. It ended with him telling her that he couldn't do this with her. He thought they were taking things too fast. He thought they needed a break, despite her vocal objections and he didn't really seem to care what she had to say about it. They were over. It was done. And then... and then he just left her in the middle of her flower garden to weep alone.

That was three months ago. She'd finally gotten over the pain. It was sort of a dull ache now, but there was a part of her that was still raw. A part of her that wanted to sock him square in the face. The rest of her just wanted to leap into his arms and cry like there was no tomorrow.

What in her had changed at that moment, not a one could guess. Perhaps it was thinking of all that she had lost already, knowing that she wasn't willing to lose anything else. She was like a flower. Delicate, not suited for this harder world, but somehow she had to make her place. If she didn't start standing up and fighting her own battles, how could she possibly do her duty? Really, the planet, it had given her so much and as of late she'd rarely thought about it, instead she meditated on trivial matters of self. She fervently wanted to become that woman in the future; that woman who was still scared to die, but unafraid to face her future.

A future that most likely didn't include him... she was sure then, that the planet had sent him somehow, to close up the loose ends that hung between them.

* * *

I'm aware that wrong-est isn't really a word... and I don't care. B'WAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!! 


	6. Impressionist Afterglow

It should be noted that the views and opinions of Reno do not reflect those of the author and her subsidiaries.

* * *

"Aeris? Aeris, are you okay?" 

His voice brought her back. Harsh anger lines melted away, her face softening as she smiled, the leftover tears gathering in her eyes taking the time to fall. "Yeah, I think I am."

He frowned, hesitantly approaching her, hand extended. Reaching out, he tentatively took her hand in his, squeezing it reassuringly. "You sure?" he asked, giving her hand another squeeze. "Cause you're... you know... with the crying." He made a funny face, pantomiming tears with his other hand. She nodded, a fresh wave of tears coursing down her face, which didn't help his distress in the least. "I'm sorry, okay? I'm sorry! Please, no more crying!"

"GOD! You're so stupid," she sobbed, smacking his chest when he just stared at her dumbly. "You're supposed to hug me now."

"You were yelling at me. Sort of kills the incentive," he muttered as he gently pulled her into his arms.

"I wouldn't yell at you if you weren't such an idiot," she grumbled, her voice muffled by his chest.

He smiled and held her closer. That simple action sent a wave of emotion through her so intense that she nearly choked on it in an attempt to stifle the tears. Every muscle in her body became painfully rigid as she tried to hold it all back futilely. He pressed her closer, enveloping her smaller form in his and suddenly the tension just left her. She let it all go, allowing herself this temporary relief. It would not last but it felt good to be held by him and for now she wasn't going to be ashamed of that. Little did she know but at that precise moment his thoughts had run along the same lines.

Smoothing her hair, he looked down at her and sighed audibly. Aeris had never been the most predictable girl. She wasn't like other girls, in more ways than one. It was what had attracted him to her in the first place. Right now, she was behaving a bit more like a normal girl, though in her own special way. He was sure once she was through with her tears, she'd probably beat the living tar out of him. Zack smirked, almost looking forward to fending her off. She was quite cute when angered.

He sighed again, eyes staring out blankly as he contemplated what he'd come here to do. Words had never been his forte. Action had always been his gig, but even as dense as he was sometimes, he knew that this time his words would have to speak louder.

Worse, this situation required the _right_ words. Being that he and words had an uneasy alliance at best, not to mention the fact that he had a rich history of picking the _wrong _words, well... he was pretty sure he was humped.

With another, more determined, sigh, he pulled himself together and ruffled her hair, a surefire way to get her to look up. It worked like a charm. He was suddenly gazing into large, incredibly green eyes, wide and still wet with tears. In the moment, he became aware of just how young she was.

His next few words, hell, the next few sentences were the most important thing he would say in his life – and hers. Licking his lips, he felt a surge of almost giddy nervousness.

_No pressure, Zack, Ol' Buddy, Ol' Pal. No pressure at all_...

She was patting down her hair. He had at least five seconds before she started yelling at him. He took the opportunity.

"Hey, Aeris, I've been thinking," he began, trailing off when his mind went unhelpfully blank.

"Yeah, I know. You said that already."

The tone of her voice suggested rising annoyance.

"Well, uh, you know how you wanted me to quit working for Shinra?"

She nodded slowly. That had been a bit sore spot for both of them, one of the many things that had bogged the relationship down. She didn't quite like the idea of starting a life with someone who was connected to the company that hunted her and was destroying the planet she sought to protect, and he didn't really understand why she was so vehement about it, mostly because that when pressed, she refused to explain. It had irritated him. It wasn't like he didn't know she hid a pretty big secret. It wasn't like he didn't know the Turks were after her. Hell, he even knew who contracted the Turks in the first place. He'd wanted to hear it from her. He wanted her to tell him, not because he browbeat her about it, but because she _wanted_ to tell him because she _trusted_ him.

He'd read that in one of those magazines she liked so much, having read them non-stop since the day they'd broken up – though he'd never tell her in a million years.

And from reading those magazines he became aware of a vital fact. He realized they were both so damned stubborn, that neither of them bent, hence the argument became never-ending. That is, until two days ago, when Zack had an epiphany of epic proportions.

Things had been quiet even since the end of the conflict in Wutai. Accordingly, Shinra had to figure out what to do with their First Class Soldier Elite, as they were, technically, not needed anymore. At first, most of the things they'd been asked to do were right up Zack's alley, which was to say any military assignment that was too dangerous for anyone else to do and required a certain amount of stealth and skill. They'd dealt with a few hostage situations, some limited SWAT work – not to mention the anti-terrorist initiative President Shinra had set up with them specifically in mind.

This was where the problems began. Shinra had decided that the Soldier Elite were to be the public face of Shinra. So instead of doing exactly what it was they were trained for, Shinra had relegated them to the level of your friendly neighborhood policeman: guarding dignitaries, patrolling the streets with a small contingent of grunts to fool people into believing they were safe... hell, Zack was sure they'd be rescuing kittens from trees pretty soon.

Sure, not being in constant danger was good. Doing good for people was... well, good. But that's not what it felt like to him. He didn't like being the public face of anything, and he knew everyone else in Soldier felt the same. They hadn't gone through rigorous combat training and mako treatments to open malls and mix with celebrities. It was a mockery of what he felt Soldier stood for. All the sacrifices they'd made. All the battles they'd won or lost, and the friends they left dead in the field – it seemed like all of that was for nothing. He had joined Shinra's army to _be _someone, to protect home and hearth... to be a hero. He didn't join up to be a grinning mask on a poster.

What it got right down to was, he didn't think he was _doing good _anymore. He felt like he was a small part of a larger machine. See, a long time ago, he'd been blind to the suffering beneath the plate, just like most people were who didn't have to live there. Aeris had changed all that. He'd seen and he'd heard, and nothing could take that away, even when he tried hard not to think about it. Shinra was glossing it over and using the Soldier Elite to do accomplish their goal, in more ways than one. He saw that now.

It had started a few weeks ago. A riot had broken out at a peaceful demonstration in Sector 2. There had been a group of environmental rights activists and not just a few upper plate university students but a veritable battalion, who were protesting the quality of life under the plate. Specifically, they'd been concerned about what was in the water due to a rash of illness that had been traced back to a reactor leak that had spread through the municipal water treatment plant.

So a gathering had been held in what served as a park under the plate. The Soldier Elite, along with a contingent of grunts, had been sent down just to make sure nothing happened, but something HAD happened.

On the evening news, they'd reported the protestors had thrown rocks and bottles at the armed forces which justified the use of lethal force. Truth was, not one bottle or rock was thrown. A jumpy grunt had started to fire into the crowd indiscriminately and when they'd panicked and fought back, chaos had ensued.

Zack had done everything in his power to stop the riot, but he was only one man. By the time the dust settled, seven civilians had been killed – three of them students. A few grunts had been injured, but there'd been no fatalities on Shinra's side at all.

But what stuck with him... the one thing he'd remember the rest of his life from that day was the image of a small child, clinging to its dead mother as it wailed. He'd come upon that child in the aftermath, and when he went to pick that child up, she cringed in fear and sobbed all the harder. He sat on the curb and watched her from a distance until a social worker came to collect her.

Minutes afterward, he'd been dragged into Shinra headquarters and quickly debriefed, and then promptly shoved in front of the cameras to explain what had happened to the press. He had lied to them; lied as smoothly and as coolly as a professional and it made him sick to his stomach. Looking out into those glaring camera lights but seeing the image of that cowering child, he realized that _this_ wasn't what he'd gotten into Soldier for.

That had been the beginning of his epiphany.

The exclamation point at the end of the epiphany had been the orders he just received this morning. They were being sent on some bullshit monster hunt in the boonies. Sure, they were also supposed to protect a crew of repair workers sent their to fix a malfunctioning reactor, but for the most part the mission was pretty much a bug hunt in the middle of damn nowhere. Correction, it was a bug hunt in the _mountains_ of damn nowhere – Nibel-something. The only interesting thing about the mission was he'd finally get to work with the illustrious General Sephiroth. He'd heard the rumors about his power but didn't believe half of them. Soldiers had a tendency to exaggerate. Still, whether the things said about him were true or not, Zack was sure there was loads he could learn from the Great Sephiroth. This, of course, was beside the point.

The whole mission was nothing more that pointless busywork, meant to garner more positive PR for Shinra. No doubt, when finished with the repair job, the story of their success would be "leaked" to the press, along with scads of impromptu photos of them mingling happily with the citizenry.

Shortly after having received those orders, the thoughts he'd been holding back broke through. Zack had always wanted a family eventually. Having a great job was a part of that because he understood that a family needed stability. He thought he found that at Shinra but more and more he wondered if that was enough. Sure, a steady paycheck was good but if that paycheck came at the expense of others, what kind of message did that send?

When he had children, he wanted to be proud of his job. He wanted to be a role model for them and he didn't think he could do that working for Shinra. Besides, the woman that would be their mother (or so he hoped, anyway) wouldn't approve.

That was the other thing he'd been thinking about. Whatever secret she held, he had plenty of time to find out and he could wait for her to tell him, because, really, he learned there was no other woman that was as perfect for him – not like she was. He couldn't think of spending the rest of his life with anyone else.

Right now, he couldn't promise eternity but he really wanted to try. And so... he smiled at the shocked look on her face. He nodded when she asked if he was really serious about quitting Shinra. And he hugged her close when she smiled brilliantly.

Abruptly, she pulled away, which disappointed him a bit, and graced him with a troubled expression. "Zack, why? Why are you quitting?"

Hell, she knew the answer and she knew that he knew that she knew and he wondered why she asked in the first place, but he supposed clarity was always important.

"You."

"Me?"

"Mmhmm," he hummed, nodding in affirmation.

"But... but WHY?"

"Because I was thinking that maybe... possibly... we could give it another go."

"Wha—I don't understand. You want to..."

"And I thought I was the dense one!" Zack chortled, ruffling her hair again while she huffed adorably. "I want you to give me a second chance. I was a jackass and I want to make it up to you." He went silent, overwhelmed by his own words and the kernel of doubt that rested in his heart. Would she, could she forgive him? "If you'll have me, that is."

"A second chance..." she whispered, feeling equally overwhelmed and unbalanced. "What is this... is this your idea of a joke?"

He smirked a bit, tweaking her nose. "I'm always serious, no joke. I wanna be with you, and only you. After this next mission, I'm quitting Shinra. I thought of setting up a business down in the lower plate, bodyguard for hire sort of thing. Offer myself at a reduced rate to anyone what can pay, any amount – hell, I think I'd even work for free if it came to it. Point is, I want to help the people down there and... I figure what better person to protect them from Shinra and all the other monsters down there than me?"

Aeris looked at him doubtfully, shaking her head. There was no way she was hearing this, but the look in his eyes said otherwise. She'd never seen him so determined and suddenly the hope she'd felt so distantly as of late surged forward.

"You're serious, aren't you?"

"One hundred percent," he affirmed. He turned away, his cheeks coloring uncomfortably. "You know, I can't do this all alone. I thought that maybe there's a certain business savvy flower-girl that might help me with the paperwork side of things, not to mention I could use a good healer. You know, being as prone to head injuries as I am."

She exhaled heavily, and for a moment he was worried, but then she just looked up, shook her head, and smiled. "Fine, I'll do it."

"Do what?" he asked, swinging her around until she giggled. "Give me another chance or the business thing?"

"Both, you big doofus. Both," she sang, fingers clutching his shoulders as she held onto him tightly. "Now let me down."

He did, but he didn't let her go. They talked quietly after that, making plans neither of them were sure would ever come to fruition, but it felt good to make them. It felt right. They were interrupted from their reverie by a harsh '_Ahem_' coming from the entrance to the alleyway. There stood Reno, leaning against the wall, arms still crossed, glaring at them. He'd witnessed about half of the annoyingly tender reconciliation and could take no more, not if he wanted to keep breakfast down, anyway.

"Sorry, I'm interrupting," he stated, clearly not apologetic in the least. "Aeris, don't you have business to attend to?"

She stared at Reno, then Zack, and shook her head. "No, not really."

"Pfft! Fine, I guess it ain't none of _my_ business that half your flowers have 'walked' away while you were makin' kissy face with Spike over there."

"You didn't stop them!?" she accused shrilly.

"Maybe... guess you won't know till you check," he retorted smoothly, examining his nails with mock-disinterest.

Grunting, she turned back to Zack with an anxious look on her face, who immediately anticipated her thoughts. "Don't worry, love. You go. I'll see you later."

"When do you leave?"

"In about a week."

"Will I see you before then?"

"'Course! I expect you to be there to see me off," he pronounced with a half-serious grin on his face.

"I'll be there."

"Good." She turned to leave. He caught the triumphant smirk on the Turk's face. Giving back as much as he got, Zack smirked in return and twirled the girl back into his arms, kissing her full on the lips until she was breathless. When he pulled away, he stage whispered: "I love you, Aeris."

Still stunned from the kiss, her cheeks flaming red, she murmured back: "I love you too."

The Turk's narrowed eyes gave him a delicious sense of satisfaction. It was clear that Reno had designs on the girl. Aeris was, as always, oblivious. She'd never been able to tell when a guy had the hots for her, which was most of the time as she was a very pretty girl. And if Zack knew anything about pretty girls, it was this; they tended to have lots of guys sniffing around them, hoping to get lucky -- no matter how remote the possibility. Reno was no exception. Zack heard the rumors about him – the Turk was almost as big a ladies man as he had once been.

Her hanging out with someone like him didn't set with Zack all that well. Not only because of his rep as a player, but because he was a Turk. They weren't known for their scruples, they were known for their lack thereof. Clearly, the Turk had been acting as her bodyguard. He didn't think Reno would have attacked him if he wasn't. Question was why he was doing so in the first place? Something was definitely up, and if he had more time and if his relationship with Aeris wasn't on such shaky ground, he'd be demanding answers right about now. As it was, he knew he'd have to trust Aeris. She had her reasons, no doubt, and it really wasn't his place to question her. He'd never been the demanding, possessive type anyway.

Of course, this didn't mean he wouldn't warn the Turk off after he got back. It just meant he wouldn't flip out and beat the living tar out of him in the alleyway – or ever really. And as he walked past the Turk, he smiled amiably, stopping in front of him to clap him on the shoulder... _hard_.

"Thanks for keeping an eye on her for me, man. I owe you one."

"No problem, _buddy_," the Turk sneered, shrugging his hand off as he paused for a moment before pointedly adding, "Heard you got a month vacation in Nibelheim. Hope you have a _real_ good time and don't worry, I'll continue to keep an eye on her... as a personal favor from me to you."

Zack smiled slowly, refusing to be goaded into a fight, even though it was sorely tempting. "You do that then," he said before turning away to offer a final farewell to Aeris, who _seemed_ puzzled by the tension in the air.

Reno watched the Soldier's form fade until it was obscured by the distance and the crowd, his eyes narrowed dangerously. "Get tea-bagged, pooftah," he snarled under his breath.

Clearly, he didn't think he had been overheard and he was quite surprised by the not-at-all-amused cough behind him. Aeris glared at him with lips pursed, her eyebrows disappearing into her hair. "Well, would you like to explain yourself?"

Reno froze instantly. He remembered one of the old nuns that had tried to impart some knowledge into him during his brief, and mostly pointless, time in school. She had been an insanely thin old crone with beagle eyes and a hooked nose. Kids in class used to joke that the whole nun thing was a cover – they said she was a witch. Reno didn't know from witches, but the old bat sure as hell was something that rhymed with it.

He remembered the look the Ol' Heifer would get on her face when she glared at him with her good eye. It was that look that so many teachers wear when faced with a child that tried all patience; weary, exasperated desperation – as if they were hoping for an errant bolt of lightening to strike their tormentor, AKA their student, dead.

Right now, Aeris had the very same look on her face, though she wore it MUCH better. Really, he didn't mind it so much on her, but for the fact that it reminded him so vividly of that old nun.

"Well, are you going to answer me?" Aeris pressed, trying her best to mask her impatience with him.

"Yes, Ma'am!" The squeakiness of his reply startled her into awed silence. Quickly gathering what pride he had left, he coughed and grunted lowly, as if to firmly assert his complete manliness. He crossed his arms and attempted to look serious. "What was the question?"

"What was that all about?" she repeated, not deterred or distracted by his strange behavior.

"What was what all about?" he asked in a parody of innocence, hoping to deter or distract her by way of confusion.

"Ha," she laughed lightly, realizing he thought she didn't notice. _Typical man_. "You actually thought I didn't notice you two playing 'quien es mas macho' over there, did you?"

"HEY! I AIN'T PLAYIN' TIN-ASS-MACHO NOTHIN'! I'M ALL _MAN_, BABY!" he shouted, instantly enraged at what he could only guess was an insult to his masculinity. "YOU WANT ME TO SHOW YOU HOW MUCH OF A MAN I AM--"

And with that, he prepared to unzip his pants and whip it out.

"OH, MY GAWD, NO!" Aeris cried, closing her eyes tightly and waving her hands frantically in the air, as if the action somehow would stave him off. "PUT IT AWAY! PUT IT AWAY! I DON'T WANT TO_ SEE_ IT!!"

She shouted like that for a good three minutes before she noticed he was laughing at her... hysterically.

In between gales of choking laughter, he managed to wheeze out: "Y-yu-yuh-you actually thu-thought I was... I wuh... I wus gonna..."

Her face took on the look of a constipated toddler, all red-faced and angry. "YOU JERK!" she exclaimed, smacking him on the arms repeatedly in a sad attempt to stop the peals of laughter coming from him.

Once she'd tired of walloping his shoulder and he stopped laughing, they left the alleyway. Aeris felt that she had a full day, despite the fact that it was well before closing time. She informed Mr. Fennyman of her decision and proceeded to take down her display with Reno's begrudging help, of course. He'd been quiet for a few seconds which was always cause for worry.

After a moment, he spoke. "Hey, Aeris... what does tin ass macho mean? I mean, I get macho but the tin ass part? I don't appreciate bein' called names or nuthin' and I ain't no fruit..."

Had this been the first time he'd said something like this, she probably would have laughed uneasily, all the while praying he wasn't serious. Instead, she just shook her head at his ignorance and packed away her flowers. He wouldn't give up and she tried her best to ignore him as he ceaselessly pestered her about the meaning behind what he considered a terribly mysterious insult. And as the last slat of her display was tucked away for the night, they meandered through the lavender hued evening, barely noticing the light fall of snow that powdered the world in a translucent glow as they headed for the small church.


	7. Sympathy for the Devil

--_Who would ever suspect that they were no longer the mind behind the other end of their internal conversation_...

--Nail Bunny

The It, his interior, howled like an empty wind as once again Sephiroth watched his quarry silently. Watching was all he could do; the Turks had her under surveillance every hour of every day, whether it was Tseng's little errand boy, Reno, or Tseng himself with a gaggle of his best men at his side. For her part, the flower girl didn't notice a thing. Her sentinels were there always, keeping to the shadows so the girl could have some semblance of a normal life, and Sephiroth was sure Tseng preferred it that way. The paranoid part of Sephiroth suspected that Tseng wished to keep him away from Aeris. Something inside whispered of the danger the girl posed to himself, slithering with contempt for the avatar it had chosen and the object of its fear. Sephiroth closed his eyes and with great effort shut the voice out – shut himself out – because it was becoming increasingly difficult for him to distinguish one reality from another. Opening his eyes tiredly, he panted in the dark.

Why they guarded the girl so closely, Sephiroth had some guesses, but not much in the way of tangible evidence. If he'd read the documents he stole correctly, they should have been trying to capture her for study. There were whisperings that the Turks intended to invite a new member into their ranks, but who it might be was unknown. It could be the flower girl. She was special; there was no doubt about that. Perhaps that was why they protected her, perhaps not. It was a subject of mild interest, but nothing to sway him from his main objective.

From what little research he had done, he was completely convinced she was the last surviving Cetra -- an ancient. But this information helped him little; he wanted to know why she had such an effect on him. Why she quieted the seething restlessness inside, why she woke that same restlessness in an instant. Being an Ancient, perhaps she knew what he was, what his purpose was. Yes, perhaps she could reveal his true purpose. She could help him understand why he was whatever he was; more than man, but less than human. Could she drive away the madness he felt beating at his temples? Could she stem the dark, forbidding ambition that burned behind his eyes? He _needed_ to understand because he was afraid not to. Afraid of what he might do, because he was sure he would do something and soon. Something terrible, he could see it when he closed his eyes. It played on his retinas like a movie – the bloody kind that his second in command favored.

He had tried to gather more information, but his own mind seemed to enjoy distracting him with mindless routines and mental errands that kept him from thinking clearly. This made concentration ever so difficult. It took every inch of sheer stubborn will power for him to sit like a quiet stone, constantly watching his flower girl from afar.

His mind was softening slowly, the walls of resistance breaking down under the persistent pressure of that same voice. He had also become aware that the It had named itself, or perhaps he named it. Sometimes he called it mother. Sometimes it had no name – it was just the It. Sometimes that name was his and sometimes he called it just Jenova. Jenova, yes, that was its name -- Jenova, the beginning and the end. His creator, his mother and himself, all wrapped together like a present inside himself. Though it seemed when he was near _her_ the darkness inside was more silent, reduced to an echo in the back of his skull, reverberating softly. This reprieve was comforting, as he'd found himself quite unable to stop the interior from talking lately – it seemed to be freed from its bonds most of the time.

He'd always known there was something different about himself, separating whatever he was from the rest of the natural world. But even he knew that voices given names inside one's own head was a single giant step into Crazy-ville, and he was even surer that visions of eviscerating someone with a butter knife were far from normal. What really worried him was that he felt oddly pleased whenever such thoughts popped into his mind, as it brought a rare smile to his face. A smile that faded once the visions ended and the better part of himself returned, leaving him with an array of shame and guilt so crippling that he found living life day to day like a normal person to be virtually impossible.

He had seen the company shrinks for most of his life, and not one could help him understand what was wrong with him. Lately, he wondered if the voice of the interior was his at all. He'd always assumed it was, though it never really sounded like him but he just passed it off. The daydreams of violence, the voices and hallucinations were just a manifestation of his darker desires; yes, that's what it was – though lately, it didn't feel like the interior, it felt like came from somewhere far away. A place that was hidden and deep. A place that was contained and cold, full of tubes and bending metal, and in this place (he could almost see it) was a force that wanted to bend him to its will for its own shadowy purposes or perhaps he'd bend it -- it changed from day to day.

He couldn't stop the It, because it had taken something indefinable from him. Whatever _It_ had taken, it was essential to the core of his being but invisible to his conscious mind so that he hadn't noticed when the It had stolen this cog while he slept, unawares. He was convinced that his mind had become an empty vessel, and he could swear he could feel bits of himself as they slipped away. Sucked dry by a vortex, its apex where the It made its home behind his eyes. Maybe the will of the It was the will of him – maybe he and It were the same. He wasn't so sure anymore, remembering little things like that were impossible for him now.

Whatever delicate mental condition he'd been in before had rapidly deteriorated, of this he was aware. He was still sane enough to realize he was going insane. The only thing his mind could fixate on was the rumblings of It and his need to speak with the flower girl. Surely she could help him, and in the end he felt she was his only hope. So he waited patiently for a slim chance to meet with Aeris.

His chance soon came, though he couldn't be sure how many days it had been. Time proved to be quite elusive when one's mind was as disordered as his. She had slipped past the safety net that guarded her. Heading for a little abandoned church she frequented.

Sephiroth followed, trying to puzzle out how long he'd been waiting. Perhaps it hadn't been days at all. Maybe it'd been only a few hours, or even a few minutes. Things were so soft. Time? What was time when it had lost all meaning to him? Nothing but disjointed conversations. Was this his mind or someone else's? Like that old proverb... was he a butterfly, dreaming he was a man or was he a man dreaming he's a monster?

And in his most desperate hour while his mind was soft and weak, Sephiroth had almost let go but for the soft humming in the back of his skull. It came to him just as the _It_ urged him on, coming in the form of a brilliant green light, so untainted that it temporarily drove the sickness from him. He opened his eyes, jubilant for the sudden clarity of thought and a small smile curled at his lips, genuine with joy. Quickly fading as he contemplated what his eyes showed him: A vision from his nightmares. His hand wrapped around a slim neck, frightened bottle green eyes gazing at him lazily -- on the verge of death. Yes, he'd had a dream like this before. His memory being what it was, he rarely remembered once he awoke, but this one had haunted him. He dreamt of killing something so pure and good that'd stain his soul even until after his death. It would be his everlasting sin and he feared that it would come to pass.

But this was no dream. He could feel his hand around her neck, having at some point taken his gloves off. The It. The It had tried to goad him into killing her, just like in the dream he had over and over and over again. The more honest part of himself reasoned that it wasn't an It at all, that the It was him, fueled by his own dark will power, but he ignored it. _Oh god_. She was gasping for breath, his hand gripping her neck just tightly enough to cut off air but not enough to crush her wind pipe. (_To kill her slowly, the It chuckled, the sound rattling through his mind like a desiccated corpse). Oh god_... Tears stained her face, which was slowly turning blue.

Sephiroth went numb, the world stopped and he could feel his body teetering on the edge of collapse. He wanted to throw up but somehow held it at bay. Quickly, he released his hand and she fell limp to the ground, coughing and retching in-between frantic sobs and all he could do was stare in horror, hand trembling in mid-air. He closed his fist, digging his nails into his skin until it bled. It was the only way to really know if this was reality or a sick dream. His hand throbbed as blood flowed from his wound, slipping between his fingers. _Reality_. His lip trembled, and though he wished to, the tears he felt burning inside didn't come. _Is this human blood_? He gazed numbly at his hand, covered in gore as it was. His mind went blank as he fell to the ground, staring out into space with dull apathy. _What's wrong with me_?

The attack had come out of nowhere; one minute she was pleasantly weeding her garden, the next she was fighting for her life. Aeris sputtered, praying to the gods that she didn't puke. Her breath came in raggedly and she lifted her head to look at her attacker as she rubbed her neck. As she expected, it was him -- Sephiroth. Her mind blearily jabbed at her to run; resting could take a backseat to preserving her life. The mind screamed but the body didn't obey, still too taxed to move. So she sat, wheezing like an asthmatic and wondering why she was still alive. She'd figured that this was the moment. A bit different than her dreams, but in the end it would have been the same. Except it wasn't...

Her would be killer sat on the ground, not three feet from her, frozen in a catatonic stupor. His eyes were dead, face lifeless and his entire body had gone as rigid as a corpse. She'd never seen anything like it. Abruptly, he began swaying back and forth slowly, startling her a bit until she realized he wasn't going to do anything. Time stretched on, Aeris wasn't sure how long she sat there and watched him rocking like that. There was something oddly hypnotic about the sight of Shinra's great General breaking down in the middle of Midgar's slums. It was almost laughable. Indeed, Aeris caught herself with the wisp of a smile on her face, ready to let loose a small giggle. She paused, feeling suddenly guilty, which led to pity as she looked on him once more.

On hand and knee she crawled closer to him tentatively, grasping her forgotten staff in one hand. Just in case. Sephiroth did nothing, continuing his rocking silently. Looking back on it, she had no reason to try and help him. To her dying day she never knew really what compelled her to act the way she did that day. She just followed her heart, the Cetra in her blood rising to heal someone in need. His hand was bleeding badly; Aeris bit her lip daring herself to inch closer to him. Reaching out, she touched his wounded hand with her own.

"Don't touch me," he whispered huskily.

Aeris paused, before grabbing it again. "Your hand is hurt," she stated matter-of-factly. This didn't seem to impress him, as he didn't allow her to open his closed fist, which was still bleeding. "Please, let me heal you... it'll get infected," she insisted, hoping he'd see reason

"I heal fast." He snatched it away again, lifting his head up slightly so she could see his face, if only a little.

He watched her for the next few moments with interest. She had reached up at began to pull at the bow that held her hair in place, untying it with a certain look of resolve on her flawless face, until her hair cascaded down her shoulders in loose waves. He noticed at once that the scarf held a tiny piece of materia. This interested him even more and he lifted his head from its cradle, revealing more of his face.

"Why are you being so kind to me?" Sephiroth asked pointedly. "I tried to kill you--"

She smiled mysteriously. "Kindness is its own reward."

He didn't so much thank her as he just nodded his head and grunted, uncurling his fingers to give her better access to his wound. His acquiescence was, in its own way, a show of gratitude on his part, as he rarely granted anyone the distinct pleasure of seeing any sign of weakness.

As she wrapped his newly healed hand with her scarf she looked into his eyes, starting when she realized they had changed from when she first saw him. Instead of the gentle sea foam they were now, they were a bright angry green, his pupils slitted like a cat's. _Inhuman eyes_. She knew then, without a doubt, that it was the Crisis that had assaulted her and not him. She was astonished it had controlled him so easily. It was worse than she had initially thought. Touching her fingers to earth, she sought to deny what she knew in her heart. The planet hummed affirmatively, confirming her fears -- she was too late.

"Yuh-y-you're all set," she stammered, firmly tying a knot around his newly wrapped wound. She couldn't even look at him. The truth was too much for her to bear.

She didn't bear the oppressive silence well. Neither did he. And so, they sat there, neither one knowing what to say to the other as everything seemed to take on a strange sepia tone, like they were walking through an old photo. The late afternoon light pouring in golden tones as it moved on into evening. Dust motes dancing in the streaming sunlight, the earth seemingly humming around them. The single realization that had hit Aeris moments ago, also hit Sephiroth. That time was limited and what both wanted to avoid was now inevitable. He had come here for a reason, to find his true purpose and what was wrong with him. As their minds intertwined with the earth, he knew that though he couldn't pin point the exact cause of his madness, but he knew it was too late to turn back now. Years later, she would point to this moment in time as the very moment she had finally accepted her fate, though at the time she hadn't really understood the effect her actions would have.

"I know why you're here, but I can't help you," she said softly, still unable to meet his eyes.

"Can't or won't," he spat bitterly. Being denied answers was an all too familiar scenario for him.

Aeris sighed and rubbed her brow; with resignation she led him to the center of the church – where her flowers were most prolific. Standing in a sunlight spot she turned around, keeping her eyes on him as she sat down in one graceful motion. Kneeling on a patch of grass in the middle of her garden, she extended a hand inviting him to sit. Sephiroth looked at her warily before taking her invitation, sitting down warrior style with his legs tucked neatly behind him, his hands resting authoritatively on his knees.

She waited patiently for him to get settled. An unnecessary action, as he was always ready for whatever faced him. He stared at her piercingly, everything about him simultaneously demanding attention and respect. Aeris gave him a nervous smile, quickly averting her eyes as she began.

With her fingers, she traced forms into a bare patch of earth near her. She did this with deliberate precision, forming the strokes of the runes carefully so that their meaning could not be mistaken. Sephiroth stared at her as she did this, nonplussed her actions.

After a few minutes, she was done and she leaned back to examine her work. It was perfect, just as her mother had described to her. Sephiroth wanted explanations, so she'd give them to him straight from the planet itself. Aeris glanced up expectantly at Sephiroth, a pleased smile on her face as if he was supposed to know what he was supposed to do. He looked from the runes to her, not sure what in the hell she expected.

"I don't understand..." Sephiroth commented carefully, his voice inflectionless.

"Look," Aeris replied quietly, pointing at the runes she'd drawn.

"How does _this_ help?"

"Open your eyes and see if you want answers..." she trailed off enigmatically.

Sighing, Sephiroth looked at the runes again, utterly frustrated and feeling quite stupid as he did so. '_What in the hell does staring at dirt accomplish?'_ he thought, frowning. He was about to give up again, his mind picking out a suitable insult. The girl deserved no less for trapping him into this farce of a ritual, ridiculous, superstitious nonsense... he should have seen through her ruse immediately. Nothing more than a crystal loving, tea reading charlatan, that's what the girl was.

His thoughts were broken by the distant rumbling of the earth. At first he was worried it was an earthquake or plate collapse. Then he realized the sound came from within in him, not without. As the rumbling grew louder, the runes began to glow. Trails of light distantly following the path Aeris had drawn. This process continued slowly, until each drawing was illuminated with life. The forms of the letters picking themselves up off the solid earth, living puzzle pieces that hovered in midair and then began swirling around him in a bizarrely colored kaleidoscope; until he was surrounded entirely by a wall of pure light.

He looked around in astonishment, unable to judge his surroundings or figure out where he was. Momentarily he felt as if he'd gone blind and a part of him panicked. He struggled up, though it was hard and it felt like someone was trying to hold him down, he did it. Stumbling to his feet, he reached his hands towards the wall and attempted to find a way out. To no avail, the force that held him down asserted its power, lifting him off his feet and placing him down gently in the same place he had gotten up from.

The incandescent wall swirled with life, and color gradually inserted itself into the all white world – playing on the background of his mind like a flickering film reel, images twirling and mixing until a hazy picture formed. In a small cradle nestled in the earth lay a body. Outwardly it appeared female, distorted breasts hung limply from its mangled corpse. It looked like a raisin left in the sun too long. He could see no more than just a glimpse of its rotted flesh, which had turned an odd grayish-black from years of lying in cold earth waiting to be discovered. How long had these mummified remains lay here? Not even the scientists who worked on her knew. They'd tried to carbon date it, but to no avail. Whatever they'd found defied description and every scientific test known to man.

Scientists gathered around their unique find to preserve it before the rest of it liquefied. This thing they found predated all recorded history, before man walked erect and left the caves for simple hand made huts and long before the last of the true dragons drew its last breath. This woman walked the earth, hundreds of thousands of years ago. It would even have been safe to say, millions of years ago. A dirty thumb pushed away errant flakes of mud that covered the metal plate on the corpse's helmet. There were words written there, most of them unintelligible but for one – it was a name.

_Jenova_.

The images suddenly speed up, people moving in and out like the swiftly fluttering wings of a humming bird. They went by so fast that he could barely tell one from another, until everything became a blur of living color.

He saw a lab, dark and dreary and nothing like the bright, sterile labs he'd known at Shinra. This was the kind of lab most often seen in the movies. With rickety racks filled to brimming with various specimens all suspended in fluids of various disgusting colors. And books, there were so many books that it made the Shinra library look positively pathetic. In the middle of all this was an examination chair, and on that chair was a woman. The woman he'd always seen in his dreams, reaching for him.

She was quite obviously several months pregnant and frightened.

A door opened. A man entered, and though he couldn't see his face, Sephiroth knew who he was. He could tell by the way he held himself. That silhouette was far too familiar to him. Hojo, it was Hojo... He approached the woman, who shrank back into the chair, licking her lips nervously as she watched everything he did.

Hojo moved around the lab with surprising grace as he prepared a syringe; his long fingers wrapping around the slim glass container as he stuck the needle into prepared ampoules full of fluid – one bright blue, glowing like thunder, and the other tar black. He thumped the syringe until the two fluids mixed. He thumped it a dozen times more to be sure he'd gotten rid of any air bubbles, because god knows Hojo wouldn't want his specimen dying before he'd ascertained their usefulness to him.

And then he plunged the syringe cruelly into the woman's arm. Her head tilted back, stretching farther than the neck would allow – then she turned, her gaze finding Sephiroth's. Eyes, bloodshot eyes peered beyond him and she mouthed one word – the same word that had been on the creature's helmet: "Jenova."

The name Hojo had said was his mother's. The name the It sometimes took.

He watched numbly as the woman writhed on the chair. He watched as the poison Hojo had so often injected into him did its work. He could see it flowing through her bloodstream, twisting and turning until it reached her womb and the fetus within. It infected the child as it had its mother, but unlike her... the child thrived. It grew faster, and as time sped up once more, he watched that child's birth. Watched him go from a babe to a boy, and from boy to man and he knew then that he'd just seen his own creation -- he found himself looking at a mirror image of himself -- his future self, seemingly only five or so years older than he was now. And behind his older self, he could see the blackened wing of a fallen angel. Blood gushed forward – carrying forward a tidal wave of gore and he saw a town in flames.

At first he thought it might be memories from Wutai, but then he looked closer. It was a town he didn't recognize. The buildings were unfamiliar, at least from what he could see through the smoke, and then it cleared a bit, and he could see the faint form of mountains behind the smoke and flame.

Bodies littered the ground, men, women and children, all together in piles, under his feet a mountain of bodies. With every step he brought death, the blood of those he killed spreading until it covered all he could see. The blood receded abruptly, slinking away like the receding tide, and all was white again.

The only thing in this vast field of nothingness was Aeris. She knelt in prayer, her hands clasped tightly as she recited a mantra. Her eyes opened and the vision Aeris looked straight at him, her eyes coldly serene The image began to flicker then, as if someone had turned on a strobe light – shadows fell over her and he could see the fallen angel behind and it was him. _He would kill her... that's why she feared..._ He held out his hands and saw the blood there. Her blood, the blood of the millions he'd killed over the years. Inside he screamed, as those souls reached out from the darkness to damn him.

He woke up howling and retching, curled up on the cold ground inside the abandoned church. His whole body ached – his muscles wracked with unimaginably painful cramps. Moaning, he turned inward like a dying insect, arms folding into his chest as he tried to blot out the agony. Through the pain, he felt someone shift his head to rest on a lap. As always, he did his best to avoid the contact, but gentle hands held him firmly in place.

"You have to rest," she prompted softly, as if talking to a child.

"Where am I?"

"My church... "

"Yes." He paused. "What happened?"

"I cast a spell -- it must have been disagreeable to your system."

He looked up at her with glassy eyes, taking in the angel that hovered above him. Golden brown curls dipping down into view, bouncing giddily with even the smallest moment. It felt like home here, and he wondered how long she'd let him linger. Oddly enough, the fear he saw in her eyes was gone.

_He would kill her and yet, and yet..._

Aeris, herself, was quite content to let him lay in her lap. She seemed to attract very pretty men who were prone to head injuries of one kind or the other. It was her cross to bear, she supposed. The pity she felt earlier had grown into sympathy. So now, she was faced with quite a cacophonous jumble of thoughts. Even though she knew he was beyond salvation, Aeris could plainly see the surprising amount of humanity within him, but she could also see the demon within devouring it, and she knew that one day the person she saw here would be gone.

It was easy to hate and fear that which you don't know. Yes, it's so much easier to be afraid of an unknown threat, a shadow walking down the street, but when one looks into the heart of a man, no matter how flawed, you can always see that indefinable something that makes all of us, even those who've become monsters, human.

Still, those thoughts made her uncomfortable and suddenly she realized the position she'd put herself in.

"I-I... I should go..."

He noticed her discomfiture, and slowly sat up, his eyes still trained on her face. All he knew was that he didn't want her to leave, not yet.

"No, don't – I... What was that spell you cast? I've never seen anything like it."

Aeris smiled, her uncertainties forgotten. No one had ever asked her how her magic worked. Not noticing his delay tactic and forgetting her previous feelings of embarrassment, she began to explain. "The spell itself is much similar to most time based spells, like Stop or Haste... modified with a gravity spell to create a hole into the space/time continuum. Once the hole is open, it's just a matter of pulling the targeted matter into the vortex, finding the correct timeline and pinpointing a series of events, past or present, you'd like to view."

Sephiroth blinked blankly at her explanation. Materia theory was an interesting subject, and one he had studied with aplomb. In fact, he liked to consider himself quite an authority on the subject. From all his studies, he had learned that materia was ultimately unalterable -- you couldn't change it, you could refine it to make it more powerful but you couldn't alter its essential purpose. Sure, you could combine different materia together and get different effects; he understood that part of it. However using magic like that in such a massive manipulation of time and space was unthinkable, though it seemed that this was essentially what she'd done. He sat up and looked at her closely as if she'd spoken to him in a foreign tongue.

"Come again?" he queried, cocking his head to one side, punctuating his confusion.

Aeris laughed, forgetting that not everyone was quite as adept as she, even the great Sephiroth. "Time is like a vast river and we're all like boats on this river. Now, all beings on this earth can only go forward, because they don't know how to manipulate their oars the right way. My spell allowed me to guide your oars, so that they could move in whatever direction you pleased."

"You guided me? So, does that mean you saw what I did?"

She nodded slightly, uncomfortable that they were switching back to more personal issues.

"Everything?"

"Yes," she answered quietly, looking down at her fingers with interest.

"So you saw the last vision then. The one where-- Is that the future?"

Aeris became numb and instead of an audible answer, she only shook her head 'yes'.

"Why do I do it?"

"I don't know," she lied, flinching inwardly at her deception, even though it was for the greater good -- she had to protect the natural order of things or so she told herself, anyway.

"Is there a way to stop it?"

"No, it's too late."

"How do you know that?"

Aeris could feel his stare on her, expecting more of an answer. What right did he have to pull it from her? What did it matter to him? She was the one who was going to die. Barely keeping herself civil, she snapped curtly: "Because I just do."

"That's not good enough. How do you know?" he insisted, becoming a bit irritated with her himself. "Because if there is a way to change this..."

"Believe me, if there was I would have found a way already. This path is unalterable. I know, because this isn't the first time I've seen that vision. It's been with me since I was young. I think this is something that has to happen--."

"So, the planet says you have to die to save it, and you just accept it? You would do nothing to stop it? You are a fool..."

She sighed as it became harder to keep her patience with him. Talking about this with _him_ made her want to scream. "What would you know!? You're blindly ignorant of this planet's suffering! Gaia is dying slowly. Everyday I hear its screams, I feel its pain. I'm the only one who's noticed and the only one who cares, because of what I am, the planet's last shepherd. Humans can chose to ignore her call, but I can't. So, yes, I'd give my life for her because she is the mother of us all, even you. Gaia is our _home_..."

Stunned silent by the passion of her words, he shook his head as he struggled to with himself. "I don't understand..."

Aeris smiled sadly. "No one does."

"How does my killing you help the planet? If you're the last Cetra, I'd think the planet would want to bloody well keep you around."

"True. But..." She paused to collect her thoughts. "For thousands of years, the planet's been waiting for a miracle. Very soon the stars will align and the time will finally be right. Once that time comes, the planet can be healed... _but _for such a gift, there is always a price – to preserve balance. So in order to heal the planet, a sacrifice must be made."

"How do I fit into it, why me?"

"I don't know. The planet only shows me what it feels I need to know. It can't allow me to know too much of my own future. It's against the laws of nature, and all that."

"So that's it then? I'm damned for all eternity for reasons I'll never understand," he snorted.

"Pretty much," she said, shrugging her shoulders indifferently as she reflected that this was the oddest conversation she'd ever had.

He grunted and shook his head at nothing in particular. "The universe is a shitty place sometimes..."

"Yeah, it is," she agreed, tears coming to her eyes.

Sephiroth gazed at Aeris, a bitter smile on his young face. She returned the smile, and without warning, she lifted her hand up and placed it gently on his cheek. She couldn't give him understanding but at least she could give him temporary relief, moreover, she could make him forget.

_Let at least one of us be at peace with this, ignorant of fate. _

He felt warmth flowing from her fingers as she revitalized the last bit of humanity within. It beat back the walls of black sickness temporarily; connecting him with a power he'd never even known existed. A warm chorus filled his mind. At first, it sounded angelically blissful but gradually the song became a mourning wail and suddenly he felt it – he felt the planet aching and moaning as its energy was being drained, bleeding from a hundred different wounds all over the world. At each wound, a reactor sat above it. From this buzzing in the back of his mind he understood what her role was to be and what his role was, and how, in the end of all things, they were to change the world. He understood briefly, why fate had placed them at this crossroads, because of what had to be. A single tear slid down his cheek, and he looked down at Aeris with complete understanding.

_This is the work we have to do. Our purpose, our reason for being here. _ She whispered to him through their tenuous mental link, before letting her hand slip back into her lap. Within twenty four hours, he wouldn't even remember his visit here. He would forget all that she showed him, but for now – she let him have this moment.

Looking deeply into her eyes, with silent communication they knew the next time they'd met, things would be different. One would be sainted, the other damned for all eternity. History painting a pair of black and white caricatures of who they were, leaving the plain fact that at the core, both Sephiroth and Aeris were human. Fate was cruel indeed. That it'd let them know this, and still force them to face what lay in their future.

He watched her face, aware of the frightful choice she had to make. He was lucky. There was no choice he had to make. His malady had been put upon him, a curse he was born to bear. He'd go insane no matter what happened. But this girl, this woman, she would summon the courage to face him in all his madness and put a stop to it. He'd never been able to say that he cared for another person, but had he been able to, he thought that he might have fallen in love with her if given the chance.

_Only the purest light could pierce the darkness_...

With great gentleness, he titled her head up so that he could see her face one last time before he forgot its symmetry. Slowly, he pressed a farewell kiss into her forehead, a kiss, it seemed, that sealed both their fates.

Pulling away, he whispered in her ear: "I'm sorry."

A simple apology for the terrible choice she had to make and what hell he'd put her through to get there. Aeris stared at him in astonishment and was unable to move from sheer shock. He smiled and stood up, exiting the church without so much as a look back, his darkened form fading into shattered moonlight.


	8. The Last Train

"What do you mean... she's _gone_?" Tseng demanded; his voice calmly quiet despite his growing ire.

He paused to regard the trembling mountain of flesh that stood in front of him. The young monolith was the newest member of the Turks, his name was Carl and by all estimations he was a certified idiot. That being said, Tseng had trusted him with the easiest assignment. Something most five year olds would have little difficulty doing, nearly impossible to screw up. Apparently, he was quite wrong. Tseng cursed himself for allowing Rufus to stick him with the lummox. At the time he'd reasoned that taking on Carl would allow him to curry favor with the Shinra heir but now...

Carl was Rufus's cousin and nothing more than a punk ass wannabe. None too bright and possessing no skills, he was a dead weight. Tseng had told this all to Rufus when Carl interviewed for the job and the Shinra heir had agreed with him completely. Carl had no place in the Turks, but his father had requested that he find his cousin a job, lest the boy be cutoff.

At Shinra, those who didn't push their weight didn't last long and Carl had a lot of weight to push. He'd had a string of menial labor jobs he'd managed to bollix, mostly because he was an ineffectual lay-about barely able to master the fine art of mopping. What Tseng really couldn't believe was that someone at Shinra actually thought it'd be a good idea to promote him to a higher level job when it was quite clear he couldn't be trusted to handle the counter at the company cafeteria.

The thinking was that if given a prestigious job that Carl would be more motivated to succeed. As if some kind of hidden industriousness would magically appear out of his ass and bless Carl with something resembling intelligence. Tseng wasn't really that surprised when it didn't. Carl was as useless as always. His slothfulness becoming more than just a way of life, it reached into the sky in legendary proportions like the world's tallest, fattest, most purposeless building.

The thing that galled him the most was that he actually _trusted _the boy this time. Hoping vainly that Carl would manage to at last do something right. Hell, this job was right up his alley. All the fat bastard had to do was sit on his ass and watch Aeris through a pair of thermal binoculars. If she made a move to leave, he was supposed to call Tseng. Ah, but Carl, being Carl, managed to find a way to fuck it up – really, it was a gift, he decided. Fucking up the un-fuckable. Tseng had found him twenty minutes ago, fast asleep with a humongous beef sub on his chest.

Knocking the sub off his chest, Tseng awoke the boy with a backhanded strike to his face. In the back of his mind he remembered promising Rufus that he wouldn't lay a hand on his cousin. Carl was to be given special treatment, lest he go back and whine to the President or his daddy, the Vice President. Currently, Tseng didn't really give a two sucks on a dead man's dick about the President or his promise. He'd lost patience with the boy and his anger wouldn't be denied an outlet.

He'd slapped Carl around a bit because his wrath needed a target, and it had made him feel marginally better once it was spent, until, of course, he checked Aeris's room with the thermal goggles and found her gone. Tseng closed his eyes and rubbed the bridge of his nose, feeling a massive migraine coming on. With a long sigh, he struggled to understand the levels of stupidity that one human being was capable of. Something would have to be done about the Carl problem, that fact was crystal clear, but at the moment, all Tseng cared about was finding Aeris. Sephiroth had gone missing for two days and was more than likely skulking around somewhere. This particular wrinkle in plans well laid was not helping matters in the least.

"I asked you a question," Tseng repeated, his velvet voice not betraying how irritated he really was. "What do you mean, she's gone?"

Carl looked at him with dumb cow eyes, answering with an ineffectual gesture toward her window. "Uh... she left?"

Bowing his head, Tseng turned around and clasped his hands behind his back. His posture was stiff, rendering him like a coiled spring in the muffled black of Midgar's night. Minutes passed and the Turk leader said nothing, bouncing lightly on the balls of his feet. He was letting Carl sweat in anticipation -- besides, he needed time to gather his thoughts and cool his current temper because he was quite close to shooting the stupid prat in the head. After five full minutes, Tseng pivoted slowly on the spot, facing the younger Turk with dark eyes that gleamed with menace.

Wordlessly, he strolled up to Carl and casually tilted his head as he bent down to stare right into the boy's eyes. The corners of his mouth turned up ever so slightly, though no joy touched the rest of his face. Raising himself back up to his full height, Tseng calmly straightened Carl's tie until it set in place neatly. With equal grace, he dusted off the crumbs from his jacket. Satisfied, he looked down at the boy once more, his face an unreadable mask.

"She left," Tseng stated simply, nodding his head to punctuate his thought. "She _left_." Upon repeating Carl's statement, Tseng began to chuckle. Shaking his head, the chuckle turned into a laugh. At first, Carl seemed reluctant to join in but after a bit, he laughed cautiously. When he saw that nothing came of it, the boy deepened the laugh. The joy he felt was short lived as Tseng caught him by the collar with feline grace. No longer taking care to hide his emotions, the Turk's face twisted in anger. Pulling the boy closer, he hissed: "Brilliant observation, fuck nuts. Why don't you tell me what color the goddamned sky is! OF COURSE she _left_, because she's not bloody well here. What I'm asking is where the FUCK did she go... we'd know that if you'd been DOING YOUR FUCKING JOB!"

"I... I... I..." Carl stammered, his mouth gapping and drooling like a fish out of water.

With a snort of disgust, Tseng roared: "YOU FAT SACK OF SHIT!"

He shoved the boy so hard that he landed with a grunt in a pile of rubbish. In a blink of an eye, he had his pistol out and aimed at Carl. The boy's eyes went wide and before he could even begin to plead for his life, Tseng shot. The bullet winged out with a nearly silent snap, embedding itself in a broken piece of concrete next to Carl's head. Tseng stood over him with his gun held at his side.

"Get up."

The boy numbly obeyed, unable to look into the older man's eyes, a dribble of piss wetting the front of his pants.

"Look at me," Tseng ordered, his voice once more devoid of any obvious anger. "You're a Turk. We expect better from you. Now go find Rude. Tell him what happened -- in detail. Find the girl..."

Carl had gotten his second wind, finding some hidden font of bravery, he interrupted Tseng. "Y-You had no right. I'm telling my Dad...You can't threaten me like that you know... I--"

"Daddy's out paying the bills, son." Tseng paused and leveled the gun at Carl. "Shinra was built on a foundation of corpses. I don't think anyone will notice one more. Do we understand each other?" He waited for Carl to nod slowly. "Good. Don't dawdle. Find the girl... _Now_."

Carl hesitated, regarding Tseng warily as if waiting for him to strike again. The Turk leader stepped back with a smile, holstering his weapon. The boy swallowed hard and slowly stood up to leave. Tseng watched the boy's bulky form retreat into darkness, bottomless dark eyes narrowing into slits. _Yes, the Carl problem needed an immediate solution_. He growled, lashing out at the piles of rubbish, kicking everything in sight.

"Keep it down, mate. You're gonna wake up the old cow with all the noise you're making."

Tseng twirled around to regard the familiar voice, his face communicating his current deficit of humor. "Reno, I'm not in the mood right now. Piss off."

"Whoa! Sorry. Didn't realize it was that time of the month," the red haired man replied, holding his hands up in mock surrender. "So what's got your panties in a bunch _this_ time?"

Reno waited for his boss to answer, if there was one thing he knew about Tseng was a bit of humor always lightened his mood, even if he'd never admit it.

"Carl," Tseng growled, briefly recounting events to Reno -- who merely nodded as he listened.

Everyone was pretty much aware of the 'Carl Problem'.

It was obvious Tseng had some steam to blow off. In the last two days he'd become increasingly tense, his manner was seven flavors of jumpy and he seemed to snap at the most innocent of comments. Reno understood why, but at the same time he recognized it wasn't healthy to live that way. The way he figgered it, freaking out about every little thing lead to heart attacks and premature graying of the hair. This time, however, it seemed that Tseng's normal over the top reaction was merited. Carl had fucked up for the last time.

"So, what're you gonna do?" Reno asked as he lit a cigarette.

Tseng stared out into space darkly before answering quietly: "When you got a litter of puppies, you can't keep all the runts. Take him to Clarkesville."

Reno nearly swallowed his cigarette in surprise. "Are you serious?"

"Did I stutter?" Tseng replied, his expression becoming coldly somber. "Call Rude, get him on it."

Reno nodded numbly, pulling out his phone and dialing up the number by heart. Quietly the red haired Turk turned away, mumbling instructions to his sometime partner. Tseng waited patiently, though his thoughts were in a jumble. The only clear thought was worry for Aeris.

He thought of the whys and wherefores. Why he felt as if he had to protect her. It was a deeply held secret in his heart, one that he would never reveal to her or anyone else. He had broken the cardinal rule of the Turks; he had fallen in love with a target. Though to his credit, he'd loved Aeris before he'd become a Turk, not that it made it any easier. They had been childhood friends. He smiled as he recalled those memories from long ago, when he was still somewhat innocent. They had met in the old Sector 6 playground.

Aeris was a strange girl, even back then. She was enigmatic, so many secrets hidden behind those green eyes and that sweet smile. Talk to her one day and she was like any other child, talk to her the next and she seemed thousands of years older. Most kids stayed away from her. They thought that she was a freak, a weirdo who heard voices, though Tseng himself never thought those things.

He was as much an outcast as she. With his sharp Wutai features, he stuck out like a sore thumb amongst the white bread inhabitants of Midgar. For this, he'd been teased and bullied relentlessly. At first he just took it, but one day he decided he'd had enough, breaking a kid's nose in a rage. After that day, he'd promised himself to never again take shit from anyone.

Aeris was the exact opposite. She never fought back, preferring to take their insults with a quiet kind of resignation. It wasn't like they didn't hurt her. They did. She was clearly lonely. Watching all the other kids play with her large emerald eyes from the far side of the playground. Sometimes Tseng had wondered why she came at all because it obviously caused her quite a bit of pain when she did. But everyday without fail she'd come.

You had to admire her tenaciousness. Tseng smiled at that thought. He remembered the day they finally met. Despite her outcast status, it was recognized that Aeris was uncommonly beautiful. This fact was especially noted by all the boys, and hated by all the girls.

One day a group of girls decided to do something about Aeris once and for all. They were all at least two years older than Aeris and quite a bit bigger. Ganging up on the tiny girl, they'd pushed her to the ground and descended on her. Hitting, slapping and kicking her prone figure, and something inside Tseng snapped when he saw that.

He, like all the other kids, mostly ignored Aeris. She was small for her age and quiet, never really bothering anyone else. So they'd always left her alone. Everyone watched this spectacle with horror, too afraid to actually step in and help. Everyone, except for Tseng. He knew what it was like to be beaten because you were different. It was a peculiar and painful form of torment, and completely unfair. Balling his small fists, he charged over and pulled the girls off Aeris, threatening to kill them all if they ever touched her again, and he had meant it.

Aeris rewarded him that day with a kiss on the cheek, which made him blush furiously, though it cemented a bond that lasted between them for many years. For her, it was an obvious brother/sister bond and Tseng respected that, even though he wished for more. All the same, no one ever bothered her after that, he made sure of it.

Time passed and with each day, Aeris grew more beautiful but there was always a feeling that there was more within her than her human shell could hold, a power that lurked just behind her fair countenance.

Time counts and keeps counting. Sooner or later childish things are put away and replaced by the detritus of nearing adulthood. Friends that you loved in childhood grow up; becoming people you barely have anything in common with, if you ever did. Aeris and Tseng were no different.

Aeris was always a pacifist, preferring to tend to her flowers than submit to the ugly violence of the city. Tseng fought, as he always had. Taking what had made him feared as a child and developing it into a rather successful, but brutal, career. Different lives, different choices. Yet there was still a strong bond of filial loyalty. Not a bond of blood, true, but a bond non-the-less. Over the years, they'd lost track of each other but occasionally he'd drop by and see how she was doing. He still considered himself her older brother and her first real bodyguard.

Now he felt as if he'd failed in his duty. There had always been an unspoken promise on his lips that he'd make sure she'd be all right. Keep her out of the hands of Shinra, who sought to use her. Turk though he may be -- he was still loyal to his people's traditions. He'd made a promise to keep Aeris safe, even if it meant his life – his word was his bond.

It was the how that worried him. The Turks constant failure to capture Aeris would only last so long. Sooner or later Shinra would get fed up and assign her capture to another division. Hojo was already rattling cages about it, trying desperately to wrest control of her files from them. Tseng would fight it, but if push came to shove, he knew Hojo, having more seniority than he, would win. The last thing he wanted to see was his little sis in the hands of that pooftah or his albino errand boy.

"Tseng? Tseng you okay?" Reno asked, worried at the odd look on his friend's face.

"Yeah, fine. Hey, if you were Aeris where would you go?"

"What?"

"Idiot, you've spent the most time with her. What places does she frequent?" Tseng snapped irritably.

Reno could only think of one place she'd go to, especially considering how stressful the last few days had been. "Her church. She'd be at her church."

Tseng grunted as a reply, checking the clip in his handgun before slipping it back into his shoulder holster. Reno twirled his EMR nervously, until he caught his boss's eye. For a moment they just looked at each other with resolute seriousness. With a mutual, wordless nod, they started for the church, walking with calm, measured strides. Determination would get you everywhere, but not fast enough for Tseng. Eventually they broke into an all out run, fearing the worst. Tseng's skin prickled, he knew that pale freak-show would be there; he could feel it and his worry for Aeris increased. His one thought in those precious few seconds was that Aeris had better be there and unharmed or Hojo would be less one precious specimen.

It's funny when one's worst fear comes true. The horrible knowledge that you were right, and, even worse, knowing that your being right didn't make the situation any better.

On the far end of the road walked a tall and imposing figure, his ghostly silver hair flowing behind him like tattered curtains in a broken window. There was no question of who it was and Tseng involuntarily curled his lip at the sight and his eyes narrowed. The General hadn't spotted the two Turks yet, looking as if he was in deep thought.

"What is it?" Reno questioned as he jogged up to Tseng.

The dark haired man said nothing, gesturing with a nod of the head to what lay plainly in front of them. _Sephiroth_. Reno gasped and went for his weapon. Dark eyes flashed, and Tseng's hand immediately intercepted Reno's sudden motion. Grabbing the red haired Turk's arm, Tseng raised a finger to his lips. Letting his companion go, he gestured to him that they ought to seek cover before the General noticed they were there.

The two Turks slipped into the concealing shadows of the debris from an old plate collapse. It gave them plenty of cover, without blocking their view of the road. The soft, almost imperceptible footsteps of the General passed them by. The Turk leader's face was stone cold, his coal black eyes trailing his enemy as he passed by their position.

The silver haired man paused just in front of the debris field, his head titling as if listening to something only he could hear. Sephiroth looked around and Tseng could do nothing but hold his breath. He got the distinct impression that Sephiroth somehow knew they were there, and it was only by luck of his seemingly pensive state that he hadn't pin pointed them. His bright mako eyes glowing eerie green in the darkness of the lower plate. Tseng held back the urge to level his weapon and shoot the sonvabitch in the head.

Sephiroth shook his head and continued on his way until his dark form merged with the shadows ahead. After a beat or two, the Turks emerged from their concealed position once they were quite sure he was gone. Reno didn't even have to ask, he merely started dialing, setting up a nice ambush for the good General. After all, he was late for his assignment and Reno would hate to see the mountain expedition lose any more time. Sephiroth had already held them up for two whole days.

Tseng shot Reno a quick look to indicate he was going to check on Aeris, as the phone call was becoming overlong. The church was only a short ways away, and Tseng was able to easily jog the distance.

For a moment he stood and stared at the crackled door of the church, something inside of him almost afraid to open it. What would he find in there? If Sephiroth had hurt her... the thought trailed. Furiously, he pushed the door open, the wood creaking on rusted hinges as light flooded the dark interior of the church. Tseng entered quietly, heart pounding.

"Aeris," he called, wincing as the sound echoed in the empty dark. "Aeris? Aeris where are you?"

"Tseng?" she called back, her voice soft and raspy as if she'd been crying.

Relief flooded him and he nearly ran into the main part of the church. Before he could even ask where she was, she appeared, silhouetted by pale moonlight. Her face cloaked in darkness, unreadable.

"Yes," he said, a gentle smile softening features hardened by life.

"You're here." It was a statement and a question at the same time.

"I'm always here. You're my little sis, remember?" Tseng paused, adding thoughtfully: "You're okay? He didn't hurt you, did he?"

"No..." She replied quietly, stepping out of the direct glow of the moonlight, towards him. As she approached, her face became more visible. It was dirty and there were obvious tear streaks that spread across her cheeks.

Tseng's heart broke as he looked down at her. How could she lie like that? "You've been crying," he stated simply, implying that he wanted an explanation.

She nodded slowly, understanding him perfectly, as she always had. "All my life, I never questioned my visions. I wasted so much time, time when I could have changed things. Tseng, do you think fate can be defied? Even if you know it's probably too late..."

"I don't know, Aeris. I'm not even sure what you're talking about," Tseng answered carefully.

Aeris looked up at him wide eyed. "I don't want to die, Tseng, and there were things I could have done to stop it. If only I had gotten to him sooner, if only I had warned him... and now." She stopped then, her voice cracking as she broke down, her tears choking her as she struggled to gain control of her emotions. After a bit, she continued, her voice sounding more broken than before. "It's too late. He's gone and it's too late. And I'm going to die, and he's.... oh god. It was so much easier when he was just... a monster. Before -- he's human. He doesn't deserve..."

"Who -- who doesn't deserve?" Tseng enquired, his blood running deathly cold, pleading to the gods to stopper her mouth before she uttered that hateful name.

"Sephiroth," she exhaled quietly, as a small amount of hope suddenly surged within her. "Tseng, you both work for Shinra. There's still a chance. If you could tell him everything I know – everything. Maybe if he knows, there'll still be a chance to avo--"

"I'm not telling him a damn thing. I don't know what's going on in that crazy head of yours, but I don't like the picture you're painting me. Do you actually pity that freak? That's fucking obscene; he's going to murder you--"

"Don't call me crazy! He's not a freak. I saw--" she cried vehemently.

Tseng cut her off, his own fury a match for hers. "You saw what he felt like showing you, but underneath all the angst ridden tortured soul bullshit is a monster. Pure and simple. You're a fool if you believe otherwise."

"Am I foolish in thinking I could save him? Am I foolish to try and avert my own death?"

"Yes, yes you are a fool, Aeris. I believe you -- I believe that he'll kill you. He has killed and will continue to kill, because he was _built_ to kill. I don't want you to die either, but I hardly think a stern admonition or cryptic bits of wisdom are going to keep Sephiroth from doing what he was _made_ to do." He was unable to stop the words as they poured out of him, despite the horrified look on her face. He was telling her everything she didn't want to hear, and he didn't want to have to say them – but they just wouldn't stop. "I've seen a million girls with the same look on their faces, the same hope in their hearts but you can't turn stone to flesh. You can't mold a monster into a man. Beauty will NEVER tame the beast. The only way this ends is with his death or yours." He paused for effect, enunciating slowly: "I choose his." His eyes were bright with righteous fury and he could see she understood the deadly implication of his last words.

"Don't."

"Why not?"

"I—You can't... he's_ human._ If we could warn him somehow, make him see--"

"Sephiroth is _NOT_ human. He's an abomination, a perversion of nature and a cold-blooded murderer."

She glared at him coldly. "And what makes you any different than him? You're a murderer, aren't you? That's what the Turks do, right?"

"There is a VAST _world_ of difference between what I do and what he does. The people I kill are far from innocent -- mobsters and thugs who already have blood on their hands. I'm doing the world a favor by riding it of them. Sephiroth kills indiscriminately. I've seen his work, Aeris. He goes into an area and when he comes out, nothing is left alive. He's slaughtered entire villages, left them desolate and empty. Killed men, women and children, he mowed through them like summer grass. Don't think that you're any different in his eyes." He stopped his litany, letting the thought sink in before continuing. "I would NEVER hurt you. Never. I'm not going to kill you. _He_ is. Your proof is in your dreams, Aeris. Sephiroth. Will. Kill. You."

Aeris looked up at him then, her face stricken with fear and sadness. She knew what he said was the truth, but there was a part of her that mourned for the loss of hope. Yes, for a brief moment after her exchange with Sephiroth, Aeris had dared to hope; believing that somehow, some way, she'd impact him and cause some kind of miraculous change that would flower and grow. Make him able to slay his demons and leave his tortured past behind to become a better man. It was every girl's dream, wasn't it? But the solid truth of it was built on a foundation of lies. A stupid fairy tale told to indulge imaginative young girls, to cushion them from the harsh realities of the world.

She had used this fable to cushion herself, to push back the reality of her own life -- her own death. Because... because she had wanted a normal life. If he changed, if she didn't have to die, then everything she dreamed, everything she wanted could be. There would be no bitter death. No half-lived life. There would be the limitless future – marriage, children, and grandchildren. And there was a flash of midnight hair and blue eyes -- a future with him, with Zack... all the things they planned, the dreams they dared to dream.

That future was dead to her now.

Her eyes dulled as she _fully_ accepted her fate. Nothing mattered anymore. It was all on autopilot now, just a matter of time before she'd become the ultimate sacrifice. And the bitter, nasty part of her wondered if that it'd be murder or suicide. Aeris slumped to the floor with this realization, her arms hanging limply at her sides. The odd, disconsolate look in her eyes worried Tseng. He had been too hard on her and he cursed silently.

Kneeling down, he joined her and put a hand on her shoulder. She looked up with eyes still empty of life or love, drained by the fatal promise of her own demise. What could he say now that would soothe her soul? There was nothing he could say, no lie he could tell to make that haunted look leave her face.

"I know I can't change things. I know I missed my chance, if I ever had one. But..." Her voice was quiet, desolate, and it cracked as she spoke. "I had hoped. It was stupid, but I had hoped..." She stopped to collect her thoughts as tears rolled down her cheek as she shook her head. "I don't care if you don't believe me but I _saw_ it, Tseng. No matter how infinitesimal in proportion, there is a part of Sephiroth that _is_ human and will remain human. And I pity that part of him, for what he's lost and will never know. I can't help it. It was easier, so much easier before..."

She went deathly quiet, the lack of sound punctuated by muffled silence of the church, and for a moment it seemed like the whole world had gone still. Minutes later, it was broken by the soft sounds of her sniffling as she began to cry.

"Why, why does everything in my life have to be like this? Ending in blood and death and horror and violence? Just once. Just ONCE! I wanted..." Her voice hitched as a sob broke through whatever calm she had kept up to this point, the last of her words were nearly lost as she burst into tears. "It's like, everywhere I go, everything I touch... I destroy."

"That's not true," Tseng breathed with careful urgency.

"YES IT IS! EVERYONE I EVER LOVED, _REALLY LOVED_, IS DEAD. OR WILL BE! I'm forced to face a future that holds NOTHING for me but death. HOW CAN YOU SAY THAT! Nothing, nothing I've touched has come to any good. In the end, it all falls away -- slips from my fingertips. I wish I was never born!" she sobbed, her tears were hot silver rivulets that coursed down her face like an avalanche down a mountainside.

"Don't you say that, don't EVER say that," Tseng chided, gathering the flower girl closer.

There was a moment where he almost let his secret slip. Almost, but he held his tongue. He knew the burden she had to bear and he didn't want to make her life more difficult. Hell, he didn't want to make his own life more difficult. Even if she returned his affection, there would be a time when they'd be at odds. Sooner or later, his being a Turk would get in the way. It was his job to hunt her, after all. He could refuse, but then they'd just kill him and get a replacement that had no problem with handing her over to Hojo.

Holding her as she wept, he could feel her frail body as it was wracked with sobs and even as stoic as he was, he felt waves of uncontrollable sorrow to see her this way. He couldn't help her, couldn't stop it and what hurt the most was the sure knowledge that in the future he'd eventually be on the other side -- another thing that caused her pain. Their time as friends was soon coming to an end, but while it was here he had made up his mind to make the best of it. He would help as much as he could, even if it wasn't enough to make a difference.

His voice tight, he continued after a bit: "Aeris, I'm sorry about what I said. People like me, like Sephiroth. We destroy. We make this planet the awful place it is. Not you, never you. You... You're a beacon in the darkness. You give the world hope, where there is none. Look around you Aeris, look at all the life you've created. How can you say that everything you touch, you destroy? How can you say that in the face of life? Whatever your fate, it doesn't end with your death. It begins with your life. It always has and always will be your greatest gift. It's what you're put on this planet for. Not to die, but to live."

He looked down at his little sister then, who smiled back up at him tears still in her eyes. Joy mixed with unspent tears as he saw life return to her eyes. His voice was barely above a whisper, he smoothed her hair. "I'm so sorry, Aeris. Sorry that you have to suffer. I'm sorry I'm a bastard. I'm so sorry. But don't blame yourself. It's because of you that I can even get up in the morning and look in the mirror. You're the only good, pure thing I've had in my life..." He trailed off, unable to continue as his emotions had rose to the surface. He closed his eyes and whispered silently, to himself_, I love you_.

Minutes passed and Tseng continued to hold Aeris as her tears subsided. Apparently his little talk had done some good, which made him feel oddly as if the night hadn't been a total waste. There were few promises he could make her that he knew he could keep. One was that he'd always love her -- the other, a solemn promise that if Sephiroth ever laid hands on her again, if Aeris's dream indeed came to fruition, he'd put a bullet in the General's head himself, with or without Shinra's approval. These were things unspoken but Tseng got the feeling that in some way, Aeris knew and understood. She had always understood. Aeris shifted position to look up at him as she wiped her remaining tears away.

"Feeling better?" he asked and he was pleased when she nodded. "I'm sorry..."

"Quit apologizing. You don't have to," she said, her voice nasally hoarse from all the crying. "You know... that was really, really corny -- what you said."

Tseng laughed lightly; glad to see his sis was back again. "Did it work?"

"Yeah, a little bit."

"Good."

Things were not perfect. Nor would they ever be. Aeris no longer felt the overwhelming despair that had nearly enveloped her but it was still there. She would have to be content to live at the moment. It was as simple as that. Strangely enough, Tseng had unknowingly given her the key to her eventual success. He had shown her the door where her power lay, in her life and those lives she touched. It was her connection to this world that made her a force to be reckoned with -- it gave her something to fight for and a reason to go on without fear. She laid her head on Tseng's shoulder, glad to accept the comfort found in the arms of her childhood friend.

"RAMUH'S ELECTRIC BALLS! GET A FUCKING ROOM!" Reno shouted in the loudest voice possible.

That broke the complete seriousness of the moment and whatever gravity there had been was dispelled. Tseng let Aeris go hurriedly, his knees popping as he got up in one swift movement. He helped Aeris up and as he did so he gave Reno a disapproving look that should have been enough to chide him into silence, but only served as fuel for his amusement. The red haired man laughed, dragging on his cigarette, a lopsided smile still on his face.

"Don't let me interrupt; I'll let you two crazy love birds alone. So, this means Aeris is off limits, right?"

Aeris and Tseng said, in unison: "Shut up, Reno."

Reno grinned, wiping away imaginary tears as he spoke. "Don't listen to the papers. I know you'll find a way to make it work. It's -- It's so beautiful."

"IT'S NOT LIKE THAT AND YOU KNOW IT!" Aeris barked.

"Damn, I wish I brought my camera! Because you know, black and white would really capture the moment just perfectly..."

With this comment, Aeris lost her temper and winged a small stone she'd scooped from the ground at Reno's head. It completely missed, flying wildly over his shoulder. Reno burst into wild gales of laughter, which served to irritate Aeris even more. His merriment stopped quite suddenly as another stone whipped out and struck him straight in the head. In surprise, the red haired Turk rubbed his forehead and looked over at Tseng, who stood there tossing another stone as if he had not a care in the world.

"That hurt, you know."

"Did it?" Tseng replied, still tossing the rock innocently. "Any more comments? No? Good. I think I've made myself clear before about Aeris and me--"

"Sweet! VICTORY IS MINE!" Reno hollered triumphantly, fisting his hands in the air. "So, Aeris, wanna go see Loveless with me Saturday?"

"Loveless... aren't tickets for that impossible to get? I thought there was a three year waiting period..."

"Hey, it's me," Reno answered smoothly.

Tseng snorted. "So who'd you sleep with?"

"No one." He went silent for a beat. "The Assistant Director." This garnered knowing looks from Tseng and Aeris. "Oh, don't give me that look! It's not what you think!"

Aeris snorted and Tseng outright laughed, muttering: "Oh, I'm suuuuuuure it's not."

"Hey! It's not! There was this free promotion thing for Shinra employees and--" They gave him another knowing look and it wasn't any funnier to him the second time around. Clearly, trying to explain was a waste of time, so he just gave up, sighing. "Okay, let's not split hairs on how I got them. I did and I want to take my Chica."

Aeris grinned. "Sure you don't want to take the Assistant Director?"

"She's not my girl."

"Neither am I."

"Is that a no?"

"You bet your red and spiky hair, it is."

"AW! COME _ON_!"

"Leave her alone, Reno. No means no. Besides, according to Wutai tradition, you're supposed to ask her older brother for permission before dating a girl," Tseng explained, his face reflecting complete seriousness, belying the humor within his sparkling black eyes.

Aeris picked up on this and extended the joke, nodding. "He's right. Rules are rules."

"You're kidding, right? He's not even your real brother!" Reno whinged; he was unsure whether or not to believe either of them. "You're not kidding. Fine, can I go out with Aeris?"

"No."

"Why?"

"Because you're a punk."

Aeris couldn't hold it in any longer. The look on Reno's face at that last remark was too much. She burst out laughing. Tseng soon followed. After a moment or two of pouting, Reno started chuckling as well.

The three of them slowly made their way out the tiny church, teasing each other as they went. Memories were made that night, soon to become bittersweet reminders of lost youth. No matter how jaded, there is always innocence to be lost. Always those things we keep sacred and vaulted within our hearts, only to be stolen from us or defiled either by our own foolishness or the malicious intent of another. What a difference five years would make.

In the still dark, none of this mattered. All that did was the fleeting merriment of those who could be called friend. The two Turks had insisted upon walking Aeris home. She seemed flattered but also horribly embarrassed, and just a little reluctant. Tseng knew where she lived and informed her of it--he'd spent much of his time there as a child. If she was worried about them letting Shinra know of her whereabouts, she had no reason to worry. Tseng would never tell them. It was a matter of life and death for him.

With Sephiroth's departure her safety from him was at least somewhat assured. However, she wasn't safe from Hojo and he had thought of something that would keep her out of his hands, at least for a little while. The only hitch was, her mother had to sign off on the papers.

The reception from Elmyra once the little band reached her home was less than pleasant. Tseng couldn't blame her; the Turks had bad reputations besides the fact that they'd been hunting her daughter for the last year or more. Somehow, Aeris managed to smooth things over, it was her special talent and though the tension remained palpable, no plates were thrown.

Tseng outlined his plan and he could tell that Aeris and her mother didn't seem too enthused. Aeris's name was to be submitted to the pool of potential Turk recruits. He'd have to have Elmyra file it for him, as his name attached to it would draw too much attention. There was argument on the matter but Tseng was patient, answering all questions and doubts calmly. In the end they'd agreed, because it would require little in the way of commitment from either of them. In fact, their complete lack of interest might serve them better than if they wanted it.

Turks were normally hired because of their skill and prowess as fighters. A Turk was rarely hired because they wanted to be one; they were hired because they deserved to be one. The only exception had been Carl and by now, he'd been taken care of. The fact that Aeris didn't want to be a Turk would be to their advantage. Allowing the Turks to "pursue" her for her talent, yet allowing them to fail without censure.

It would also start the ball rolling on a voluminous ball of red tape that would stymie Hojo's efforts for quite some time. Tseng hoped at least five years or more. It'd give him time to think of a more permanent solution. What a difference five years would make. Quite a difference indeed.


End file.
